Scrappin' Along the Digital Way

Mildew

2010-10-06T13:08:00.002-05:00

Success depends on whether you get your laundry in the washing machine before the mildew sets in on your clothes.

I laughed hard at this quote when I read it. SOOOO true! At least in my household!

God is so good! All the time!

I'm working on a process right now. I was given a task by a close friend of mine...to fall in love with the Lord.

How do I fall in love with the Lord?

I can honestly say that I love the Lord, but to fall in love with Him...hmmmmmm.

I want to delight in the Lord, which means that I want to desire to be in His presence all the time.

And to be in His presence all the time...that's the big quandary right now.

There are times when I feel the almighty powerful presence of the Lord thru the Holy Spirit and I desire to feel that ALL the time, but it doesn't happen. But that is my utmost desire...to feel His presence ALL around me ALL the time.

I need to develop a deeper relationship with my God. I need to delve into His Word and feel His mighty power thru my finger tips and in my heart.

I guess it's time for me to delight in the Lord every single day before mildew sets in on my Spirit. That would be my ultimate success!

Enemies of God???

2010-04-22T10:08:00.002-05:00

Okay, I'm gonna relate what happened to me a couple of days ago.

I was driving home from a nearby town. I had run across a very eloquent prayer on a plaque at a bookstore. It was so wonderful, that I purchased that plaque for my secret sister.

It read:

Lord,
please fulfill the promise by your Son
and
send the Holy Spirit to enlighten our minds in wisdom
and
our hearts in compassion
and
lead us to know in experience who we are in truth.

So, on my drive home, I started praying, Lord, please expose my heart to the truth.

And then I started praying that the Lord would fully expose my heart to the truth about all this sports turmoil in our lives. And as I peeled back the layers, the Holy Spirit revealed to me what was at the root of all this turmoil in our lives surrounding sports. And to be honest, I did not like what I saw lying at the root of my heart.

I'm gonna make a long story short.

When we first got involved with sports, it was just me, the Mom, who took all our sons to the sports practices and sports games for t-ball, baseball, soccer and beginner's basketball. It wasn't until football started that my husband took an active role in participating in the responsibility of taking our sons to all these events.

So, I was tickled pink that he was participating...taking some of the pressure and load off of me. And when he started coaching, I was absolutely tickled pink.

And in the beginning, I enrolled our sons in all these sports because I was thinking that I would open the doorway for them. So, that when the time came and they decided to quit playing, at least they would be making an informed decision to quit playing. They would be educated enough in the sport to make an educated decision or a wise decision about quitting, if that be the case. Rather than having them just watching the sport from the sidelines and stating that they never wanted to play without giving it an effort.

That was what was in my heart, at the beginning.

But somewhere along the way, that reason changed. And I don't know exactly when it changed, but it did.

When my husband started coaching, I was tickled pink that he was participating in our son's activities. But somewhere along the way it changed to the fact that I was tickled pink to be a coaches wife.

And also, he would come home after 2 years of coaching, stating what a turmoil he was in about coaching and being exposed to all those worldly and fleshly competitions and angry parents and angry boys and yada, yada. My husband was basically asking me for permission to quit and I never granted him that permission. I didn't do that consciously, but now I know if I had just said, "Randy, God is directing you another way, please quit," he would have jumped right on that opportunity. But I never granted him that out. I just said, "Randy, you are the only Bible that a lot of these boys will have the opportunity to read." And also, "Randy, you will be letting down our boys if you quit."

So, even though I didn't do it intentionally, I was the driving force that kept our family involved in sports.

So, on my drive home, I asked God to reveal to me why I was wanting so bad for our boys and my husband to be in sports. Why was I driving and pushing them to stay in sports?

When I was in high school, it was all the boys that were enrolled in the advanced math classes, advanced science classes, all the advanced college prep classes with me and were also involved in sports, football, basketball, baseball that were very popular. I was NOT popular! I was the valedictorian of our class, voted most likely to succeed, but I was NOT popular! I was more of the geeky, nerdy type. I did not have a large group of friends, I was NOT a social butterfly! Here I was, as a Mom, pushing my family into sports because I was seeking popularity for them!

And then the Holy Spirit slapped me in the face with the following: Those who are liked, loved by the world, those who are popular with the world, are enemies of God!

I, as a mother, as a child of God, as a virtuous woman, was training my boys to be enemies of God!

The devil had beguiled his way into my life in such a manner that I had no idea that I was doing that!

So, when I got home, I got down on my hands and knees and begged God to please forgive me! I so desperately want my boys to be friends of God and to talk to Him everyday just like a friend!

And ladies and gentlemen, you will not believe the sense of relief, peace and joy that I have gotten from officially quitting our basketball commitment for this summer! I feel from God that He is saying, "I was wondering when you would realize what was going on in your lives!" For if we are in God's will, then we will not feel at turmoil nor trouble every time we commit to do it. It will give us a great sense of peace and joy!

Thank you, God, for Your daily revelations in my life! I love You with all my heart, my might, and my soul! Thank you, God, for simply loving me back!

Back Seat Drivers

2010-04-06T09:34:00.003-05:00

Okay, I've gotta relate a pet peave of mine...back seat drivers or even passenger seat drivers.

I sit on my side of the vehicle when I'm a passenger and never let a word pass my lips in reference to the driver's driving capability. I always let them handle the red lights and merging into oncoming traffic and their braking abilities when approaching a vehicle in front of them and all the bells and whistles associated with driving.

So, why can't I be treated with the same respect when I'm driving when somebody is riding shotgun on the passenger side?

I won't name names, but let's just say that our automatic seat adjuster stopped working the other day and his legs are too long to be driving my mini van. So, on Easter, we took a family trip down to my Mom & Dad's.

Needless to say, I bit my tongue the whole trip down and the whole trip back while I was sitting in the driver's seat. I didn't once say, in a catty response, "Yes, I see that the stoplight is changing to red or yes, I see the car in front of me braking or yes, I see that approaching vehicle while merging onto Highway E." I actually physically bit my tongue every time I felt a catty response surfacing.

For what is it in the grand scheme of things? Why fight over something that was soon forgotten about when we got home?

But, I just wanted to forewarn anybody that rides with me in the future, I won't say a word about back seat driving, but I may end up with a bloody tongue in the process, though!

I hope that everybody that reads this has an abundantly God filled day today!

Digital Scrapbooking Freebie

2010-04-01T16:18:00.003-05:00

Okay, I'm gonna post a freebie. It's been a loooooong time since I've posted a freebie! We will see if anybody's been watching my blog for updates on digital scrapbooking or not!

Like I said, I'm very seriously considering starting my own website to post a lot of my sports page kits that have been discontinued from scrapbook-bytes.

This little freebie was the last thing that I was gonna post at scrapbook-bytes, but unfortunately I never got around to it. So, I'm offering it as a blog freebie for those who have been watching my blog.

I got the inspiration to do this from one of the t-shirts that my baby was wearing. It includes champ titles from baseball, softball, bowling, fishing, swimming, tennis, golf, bicycling, ballet, cheerleading, soccer, football, dodgeball & volleyball. There are also a couple of blank sewn champ titles.

Here is the weblink for them to be downloaded:

http://www.4shared.com/file/254761779/5f97387a/ChampTitles.html

If you want to leave a comment, please do so on my blog and not at 4shared. Thanks!

Enjoy!

There will be a time limit on this download, but I don't really know how long! Maybe a week, maybe two weeks, maybe 3....don't really know!

Maidservant to Oxen

2010-03-05T14:28:00.003-06:00

Okay, I've almost beaten myself up with this one: I am a wife and a mother, but not a maid!

In order to keep a clean home, you've gotta live with people that care about the cleanliness of their home. That means picking up their own dirty clothes off of the floor to place them in the laundry hamper. That also means not leaving dirty glasses, bowls or plates on end tables or window ledges rather than in the dishwasher or even the sink! That also means when making a new pot of coffee, just simply rinsing all those coffee grounds down the drain so that they don't dry in the sink and leave an icky mess! And it also means peeing directly in the toilet rather than all over the wall or floor! I think almost half of my housekeeping duties is spent in picking up after other people or constantly cleaning the bathroom!

But, as my pastor pointed out in his sermon this past Sunday, my house is alive with people!

When there are no oxen in the barn, it is a clean barn! It is sparkly clean and actually smells good! But when you add oxen to that barn, it gets to be busy and full of messy "stuff" and icky smells! But it's a sign that that barn is alive with activity!

So, albeit my house may not be the tidiest in the neighborhood and be full of sticky, gooey messes on the floor, dirty dishes whose home was found on a window ledge or bathtub ledge or dirty laundry on the floor, it is alive with people!

And as Christ so eloquently states in the Bible, we should be servants to people.

So, I don my little skimpy maid uniform and hat, trepse around the house and continue serving my oxen!

Mooooooo! Oh man, that one just made a big mess on the barnyard floor!

Where Am I?

2010-03-04T20:21:00.003-06:00

I've gotten several e-mails asking where I've disappeared to. That I've got a fan club, both for my blog and for my designs. Ya know, I didn't think anybody read my blog at all since there was no comments made. I didn't know that I was touching other people's lives.

I need to stop writing to try to make me look smart. I need to just write from my heart. And most of my blog entries from the past are that way, but there is some other "stuff" in some of the entries also. So, I start anew, once again. Not to impress anybody at all, just to write what's inside of me. And let me tell ya, sometimes it aint pretty. It isn't flowery or flowing with poetic language, at all. It is simply me!

I just want everybody to know that I am now officially internet free at my home. So, it's gonna make it tough to let everybody know what is going on in my life. But I will try.

I'm kicking around the idea of starting my own designing website to sell my sports page kits. I need to incorporate the help of my bro-in-law for that one. We will see if that comes to fruition, or if it is an ambiguous yearning on my part, as a lot of my ideas lately have become. I come up with great ideas, but when put in action, they putter out, needless to say. I'm a busy stay-at-home Momma. I am not a bon bon eating, soap opera watching stay-at-home, Mom, either...I'm raising 4 boys and they keep me on my toes needless to say.

My lesson for today is wait...wait...wait...wait...wait...wait...wait on the Lord. God's timing is the best! You've simply gotta wait on His direction and His plan! Cuz if you go forth on your own, it will end in a flop! I've gotta wait on the Good Lord!

That, boys and girls, is the lesson for today!

See ya!

Me

Gotta

2009-10-05T23:19:00.002-05:00

Gotta love life as it comes hurdling at you at a screaming speed!

I'm learning to turn the power off on extraneous noises and soak up the Lord!

Life is like a roller coaster! Up and down and all around! At least mine is! But I'm learning to land on solid ground, now!

Jesus was the one who loved me enough to let my sins nail Him to the cross! Who else in the world do I know would do that for me???????

Scrapbooking

2009-09-21T13:45:00.004-05:00

Needless to say, I've gotten behind on my scrapbooking. And I used to pride myself on being caught up to date for each boy.

But, I'm getting the itch to do it again.

But in so doing, I'm gonna have to forego being perfectionist on each page and get it done fast and quick.

Here is what I did Saturday evening after returning from a demonstration on a digi scrapbooking software program.

Hopefully, once I get the motivation again, I can get a lot done within a short amount of time.

I love creating. I had just lost the heart to do it within the last 3 years due to a big loss. And it was all my fault! So, I didn't have the heart to rescrap the pictures that I had already spent time scrapping in the past.

But hopefully, I'm back in the saddle again.

Faith, Trust and Believing

2009-09-17T21:25:00.003-05:00

Ya know, it's all based on faith. If you say you are saved, you've done it by faith. You have faith that Christ lives in your heart. If you pass a hardship in life, a test in life, with your faith intact, your faith has grown stronger.

Faith is such a big thing. It is believing in the unseen.

You've just gotta believe and keep the faith.

But in that aspect, I've also got real, tangible things to grab hold of in my journey through life that has helped to build my faith.

God has been evident in my life. Looking back, I can see Him there. Albeit at the time, I had no idea He was there, looking over me.

When I was at my absolute lowest point in my life, He was there. He prevented further damage from being done.

When I was really saved for the first time, my prayer had been answered. I just didn't really realize it at the time. But it was an answer to my prayer.

But the most tangible, real thing that has made my faith grow stronger was when the Holy Spirit touched me. And I mean He really touched me. He physically touched me behind my ears, all throughout my face and all along my arms to my hands. I felt such a tingling power running through my body. But I also realize that it was barely a pin prick from His Almighty power. If that was just a very miniscule touch from the Holy Spirit, I can only imagine what His glorious power is really like.

And that's how I guage the presence of the Holy Spirit...I can feel it tingling behind my ears now. Because that was how He first touched me. So, if you see me in church rubbing behind my ears, you know that I'm feeling His Almighty presence.

I'm trusting God to do what He has promised me.

I have faith in God, Christ and the Holy Spirit.

How 'bout you?

Innocent Man

2009-09-04T11:13:00.003-05:00

In Christ we are set free by the blood of his death...Ephesians 1:7

Ever been caught in sin? Issues associated with sin are low self-esteem, addictions, fear, disappointments, disgrace, shame...very demeaning feelings. Kind of like the thorn of crown that Jesus was forced to wear. Kind of sticks you where you don't want to be stuck. In those low places.

My own heart has been caught in these thorns.

The heart of Jesus was never caught in those barbs.

Here was a man...an innocent man. And that was what Jesus was...a man. But His heart was pure. He was innocent of everything. He was simply an innocent man.

And yet He suffered for all of our sins. He was tormented and hung on a cross. All because of my sins!

I will never, ever again complain or moan about injustice in my life! I deserve everything that happens to me in this world! Because I am guilty, guilty, guilty! Whereas, Jesus did not deserve any of what happened to Him! He died for me! He was hung by his hands and feet so that I can be forgiven of my sins! I hang my head in shame for what He had to endure for me! An innocent man died because of my dirty deeds!

The Holy Spirit pounded this point home to me this morning! And I cried and cried, knowing that Jesus, an innocent man, was tormented and hung to die just for me!

I know that Jesus dying on the cross is taught everyday, but it just was brought home to me this morning. I don't know what point the Holy Spirit is trying to get across to me, but it stirred something in my spirit.

And I think it deserves being repeated.....

An innocent man died because of my dirty deeds!

Dear God, thank You, thank You, thank You, thank You for Jesus!

Live Loved

2009-09-02T22:28:00.004-05:00

This is what God commands...that we love each other. 1 John 3:23

Do you get a bad taste in your mouth when confronted with people who you know are doing wrong, but still blatantly do it?

John urges us to "rely on the love God has for us." 1 John 4:16

God wants me to love all people, no matter how wrong I think they are in their words and actions. No matter how much I "bristle" when I'm around them. But how can I do that? How can I love people I don't agree with or who have wronged me in the past? How can I simply love everybody? How can I? I want to do that because that is what God wants me to do. But how can I?

"By living loved," says Max Lucado.

Does that speak volumes to anybody else?

If I live as though I am loved, I can love.

Can I do that?

Reality

2009-08-29T23:02:00.006-05:00

For the sufferings of the present time are not worthy to compare to the coming glory to be revealed in us. Romans 8:18

This verse jumped out of the Bible in my daily readings.

Does this speak volumes to anybody else?

Do you know how much of a big deal that Satan tries to make our problems seem to us? He makes our daily failures, toils, problems, heartaches, losses, disappointments all seem almost like insurmountable things that we have to deal with day to day. He tries to make us think what a big deal everything in this life is. He wants us to think that our problems are really BIG problems!

But you know what? Absolutely everything in this life is irrelevant in comparison to the glory and wondrous amazement that God has in store for us! There is absolutely no comparison at all between what we are enduring right now and what God is going to reveal in us! We have no idea at all about the glory that God has for us...we can't even begin to comprehend what that all entails.

Doesn't Romans 8:18 put your failures into a whole new perspective? And I don't care if those failures are very minuscule in your mind or whether they are a tremendous loss or whether you are being physically tortured within an inch of your life...absolutely none of that can compare to what God has in store for us!

And this spills into 2 Corinthians 4:18....for the things seen are not lasting, but the things not seen are everlasting.

No matter what a big deal we think the things of this life are in our lives, they are temporary. Absolutely everything in this life (our home, our occupation, our families, our friends, our problems) will not last. What should matter to us is the Spiritual world. That is what we cannot see. That is what is eternal. That is what our ultimate goal should be. My ultimate goal is to love God and spend eternity with Him. And I cannot see God and I cannot see the Holy Spirit, but that is the way that He communes with us, through the Holy Spirit! And I can't see the Holy Spirit!

I'm going to go a step further with this...no matter how real our lives may seem, they are not. Reality is not what we can see, reality is not what surrounds us, reality is not our 5 senses...reality is the spiritual world. But let me tell you, Satan makes it seem as if everything around you is very, very real and a big deal! Don't you believe what you can touch, see, taste, hear and smell is absolutely real? He wants you to think that what surrounds you is IT...what is, what is. I hate it when people say you just have to accept the world for what it is...bad people live in the world and you just have to live with it, heartache and all. Yes, we have to live with it, but you know what? This is not IT, this world is not my ultimate goal. Yes, I have to tolerate it and live in it for the time being, but it is temporary! It is NOT REAL! What is real is eternal, it is what I cannot see! And the fact that what I do in this world will be reflected in my eternal world makes me want to do my best in this world and not worry one ounce about those things that Satan wants you to think are a BIG DEAL! They are not a big thing, after all!

Now, how does them apples grab ya?

Thank You, God, for your daily revelations! I feel like you are moving me in a direction I have never gone before! And I thank You for your gift of the Holy Spirit! I receive Him with joy and peace in my heart!

In the End...

2009-08-29T16:50:00.001-05:00

...he made it to the Cuba game!

'Nuff said 'bout that!

Thank you, God, for blessing me with an amazing and Christian husband!

Sports

2009-08-24T21:50:00.005-05:00

For bodily exercise profiteth little;... 1 Tim 4:8

Sports are a man made creation that exalts man. It is basically a worldly participation of man in a game where he can exalt his greatness and physical prowess, his worldly attributes.

In a nutshell, sports are flesh games that exalt man rather than God.

As a Mom, I'm struggling with my own issues in it. I've touched on this issue in the past, but what happened tonight takes it to a whole new level.

My husband has coached our oldest son for the past 2 years in football. He is continuing to do so this year. Our middle son is starting football.

My husband attended every football practice and game of our oldest.

I understand that he will not be able to attend our middle son's practices or football games that are in conflict with our oldest son's schedule. But what about those times when they don't conflict? Like tonight...our middle son had football practice while our oldest did not have practice.

But it was his Mom that took him to practice.

I'm becoming quite adept at surrenduring what I expect out of my husband and just doing what I know is the right thing to do.

But in so doing, I don't want someone to sit across the room from me making excuses for why he was not there tonight. I'm learning to take this as par for the course.

And tonight, I was quite proud of myself, for I did not react in the flesh. While he sat there making excuses, I held my tongue. I actually told him to stop telling me his excuse when he was midway through it because I did not want to react in the flesh.

But he kept going, and I continued to hold my tongue.

And I have to pat myself on the back because in the past, this would have escalated into a rather big confrontation and argument!

So, I have to ask myself, how will I react this Saturday?

My oldest has a game at 10:00 and my middle son has a game at 11:30 in a neighboring town. Will he make the effort to high tail it right after our oldest son's game to our middle son's game? I know that Mom will make that effort. I already have it planned where one of the other players family will take our middle son to his game, so that I can watch most of my oldest son's game. And then leave to go to my middle son's game and watch him play.

I have to consciously make an effort to attempt to watch both games.

Will he hang out after our oldest son's game, visiting with parents and other coaches? And just so happen miss our middle son's game?

I know that other families are struggling with similiar issues, but this beats all I've ever seen.

A parent is NOT SUPPOSED to show any sort of favoritism to one child over another child.

And as a mother that is witnessing this happening to my own children, I'm starting to get ruffled under the feathers, needless to say.

Like I said, I fully understand when there is a scheduling conflict between the two children. But when there is not the conflict, why not show support of the middle child?

I am personally taking an oath as a mother to remain as enthusiastic about each one of my children's achievements, be it my first son, my second son, my third son or my fourth son. I don't care if each one of his brothers has achieved the same thing in the past, I'm going to be just as enthusiastic when my fourth son achieves the very same thing! I have to do that, I have to do that, I have to do that, I have to do that! I owe it to each one of my children to do that!

As a mother, I'm tempted to pull all our sons out of participating in any sports programs offered at all in our community. It is opening an entry point for the devil to come in and pervade my thoughts.

But in so doing, I would be cheating my younger sons from participating in sports when the opportunity has already been provided for their older brothers.

1 Timothy 4:8 just jumps out at me and slaps me in the face.

What should I do? Any words of wisdom would be appreciated.

Dear God, Dear Lord, Dear Father, please help me with this issue. I know what needs to be done, but I don't think I have the courage to do it. Please give me wisdom and insight. Please help me to deal with this issue. I thank You, dear God, for providing me with the knowledge and the forethought on how to handle this issue. Thank You! I praise You!

I pray this in Jesus' precious and holy and almighty name!

Amazing God

2009-08-22T17:02:00.006-05:00

Okay, I've gotta relate a couple of things that have happened to me over the past two weeks.

About a week and a half ago:

I try to go out on my back deck every morning (time permitting) to praise, worship and pray to my God.

Almost every time, I inevitably end up on my knees and more often than not, I end up lying on my stomach. I love my God very dearly and I try to put my whole soul into my worship of Him.

Well, this particular morning, I went out on the back deck and it was wet. We have outdoor carpet on our back deck and I think it had rained sometime during the night. I could feel the water squishing between my toes.

My immediate thought when I went out on the back deck was, "I really don't want to get my clothes wet today because I've got to run errands as soon as I'm finished."

But I started praising and worshipping and praying. And before you knew it I was on my knees! And then I ended up in the prone position.

Immediately, I could feel the water soaking through my clothes. But I didn't care. I remained on my stomach and continued praying.

About 10 minutes later, I got up.

And my clothes were completely dry!

Talk about praising and worshipping Him...I jumped up and down and shouted to the world! Can't help but whooping and hollaring when you've had an obvious display of God's power evident right in front of your eyes!

Another thing:

Yesterday morning, same situation...I go out on my back deck to praise and worship Him.

But this time, I immediately went down on my stomach and started praying in the Spirit.

And I immediately started laughing. I mean it started out as a deep down in your belly laugh. And I could not stop. I laughed and laughed and laughed so hard. I absolutely could not stop laughing. I laughed so hard for so long, that my stomach muscles started aching and my cheek muscles started hurting. I laughed for 20 minutes at the top of my voice and with the deepest of my spirit!

John John was outside laughing with me. He thought I was playing a game and he started jumping over me.

I don't think I've ever laughed for so hard for so long! It was so uplifting to my spirit!

I was filled with so much joy from the Holy Spirit that I could not contain myself!

I needed that!

Just thought I'd share!

New Person

2009-08-18T09:41:00.004-05:00

Therefore, if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new. 2 Cor 5:17

The word "creature" is the Greek word ktisis. It is the same word used to describe the creation of the world. He created the universe with no existing materials or old elements. Everything in creation was newly made.

That same word is used to describe what happened to me. Everything about me is new! I am not an amended, corrected, improved version of what I used to be. I am an absolutely brand-new creation!

I am completely detached from the person I once was before Christ.

That old person no longer exists. She is dead. I am brand new.

I am a new person.

Ronda Altis is a brand new woman.

Let me tell you a little story...

I knew all about God and Christ while growing up. The story of Christ dying on the cross had been pounded in my head, but it just seemed like a story.

The whole Bible was just a story to me.

I had NOT known if God was real. I had actually come to the point where I was questioning God's existence. And if He did exist, He was just some far off deity that had nothing to do with me.

I plundered along in my life with no real sense of purpose or direction. I was actually baptized in water a couple of times, but with no real connection to God.

I walked hand in hand with the world. I let the devil guide me in my life. I let him whisper things in my ear and I believed him. I believed him when he told me that I had no sense of self-worth or self-respect. My sense of self-worthiness was null and void. I believed him when he told me I was ugly. I believed him when he told me that I had absolutely no joy in my life. I believed him when he told me that I would never be content with my life or my family.

Until, in November of 2005, when I realized that God did exist with the conception of my baby boy. I won't go into the details of why I thought that He existed (maybe one of these days, I'll relate my life story), but it was an obvious answer to my prayers. And yes, I talked with God from time to time, but it was only out of desperation.

At that moment in time, I got down on my hands and knees and asked Christ into my heart! It was at that moment in time that I knew He was real! He answered prayers!

I turned my life around. I followed Christ's example in the Bible.

But that was it. I didn't try to read the Bible. I didn't pray everyday. I honestly wasn't trying to build a relationship with God.

I was just living my life according to how I thought it should be lived. And once again, it was all wrong.

I was starting to slip down again. After 4 years of having Christ in my heart, I was slipping off my mountaintop.

I didn't have the Word ingrained in my heart. I just did not know anything about God. satan was stealing my joy, once again!

Until June 27, 2009....that was the moment that I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that God was so VERY real. He was right there, surrounding me, not in some far off place.

The Holy Spirit made all those stories and the Holy Bible come to life for me!

Suddenly, in a moment's time, I realized that Christ suffered and died on that cross for me! I suddenly GOT the real meaning of everything!

It was through the Holy Spirit that I received the joy that I had been searching and scrambling for all my life! I had accepted Christ into my heart, but the Holy Spirit made it SO REAL for me!

My old hang-ups, old self-worth issues, old self-respect issues....poof....they were gone! There was a brand new me reflecting back in the mirror!

And now I had the fire to read the Bible everyday, to pray everyday...to try to build that relationship with God that Jesus opened the doorway for me to do. I'm trying to listen to what the Holy Spirit is communing with me everyday.

It was like I was saved all over again, but this went to a whole new level. Not only was it now in my mind, it was in my spirit!

My husband and I sat out on our front porch last night discussing something about our church. But it progressed to discussion about what he was seeing happening in me.

He said that the woman that he married was dying.

The woman that he married was so bruised and beaten down by life. But he didn't know it on our wedding day. He learned about it over time.

He married a woman that he had visions for the rest of our marriage. But in the last 14 years of our marriage, none of those visions came to being. He was settling for what I had to offer.

But now he's seeing the woman that he had envisioned when he first married me.

He said that the woman of the past would never had the courage or the gumption to form a prayer circle at school or form a women's Bible study at our church. Or sit in an active discussion about the Bible with him! Or WANT to go to church every opportunity that came her way!

He said that the defeated woman was dying, but I was now growing into a courageous woman!

I am a brand new woman with Christ in my heart! I have joy in my heart! I am a strong woman who is worthy of God's Love!

And ladies and gentlemen, I will not let satan steal that newness nor that joy from my heart EVER again! I'm getting the word ingrained in my heart and I'm not just praying to God everyday, but I'm talking to Him everyday!

I am a very blessed woman, indeed!

And though satan may try to steal that away or try to diminish it in my eyes, he has absolutely no power nor authority over me ever again! And do you know why? Because Jesus defeated him, absolutely stripped him of his dominion, when He died on the cross!

satan has absolutely no right to ever steal my joy again!

I am a new woman of God!

Thank You, God! Thank You, thank You, thank You, thank You, thank You, thank You, thank You, thank You, thank You!

I LOVE YOU, GOD, WITH ALL MY HEART AND SOUL AND SPIRIT...WITH ALL OF MY BEING!

Dear Lord, You have given me so much! I have no excuse for accepting defeat or low self-esteem as a way of life, because You have made me totally new! Help me renew my mind to the truth about who You have made me to be, and help me to guard the words of my mouth so that instead of speaking lowly of myself, I affirm the truth about who I am in Christ!

I pray this in Jesus' Holy and precious and wonderful name!

Contentment

2009-08-14T11:58:00.002-05:00

When I kept things to myself, I felt weak deep inside me. Psalm 32:3

I get that defeated feeling when I keep things buried deep down inside. But I need to lay all my fears, frustrations and disappointments down at God's feet rather than unloading on another person or getting angry at another person or getting in the flesh with my feelings.

I have learned in whatever state I am, to be content. Phil 4:11

No matter how rough the road gets along the way, I have to be content. Contentment and peace is a gift from God.

I want to be, I need to be, and I have to be content.

Thank you, God, for my life!

Loving Patience

2009-08-14T11:48:00.004-05:00

God is way more patient with me than I am with myself. I have been known to assume when I fall, that I question my salvation. If I stumble, then I'm not truly saved. If I have old desires from my past, then I am not truly a new creation.

But you know what, I now recognize those whisperings in my ear. I now recognize those whisperings as originating from the devil.

I AM A CHILD OF GOD and satan can no longer steal that joy from me! I AM SAVED AND I AM A NEW CREATION!! God will not turn His back on me! He never did in the past, but I believed the devil. But now I'm getting grounded in the Word and now I know not to believe his lies!

"God began doing a good work in me, and He will continue it until it is finished when Jesus Christ comes again" (Phil 1:6). That promise is not a lie. It originates from God Himself and I believe that promise!

Thank you, God!

Distracted?

2009-08-11T23:08:00.004-05:00

Most of this is quoted from "The Purpose Driven Life" by Rick Warren...

My biggest distraction in worship used to be myself - my worries over what other people would think about me.

But the Holy Spirit has given me the boldness to not be ashamed of how enthusiastically I praise the Lord now!

The best style of worship is the one that most authentically represents my love for God, based on the background and personality that God gave me.

There is no "one size fits all" approach to worship and friendship with God. One thing is certain: I don't bring glory to God by trying to be someone he never intended me to be. God wants me to be myself.

Real worship costs. One thing worship costs is my self centeredness. I cannot exalt God and myself at the same time. I don't worship to be seen by others or to please myself. I have to deliberately shift the focus off of me.

When Jesus said, "Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength," (Mark 12:30) he pointed out that worship takes effort and energy. It is not always convenient or comfortable, and sometimes worship is a sheer act of the will - a willing sacrifice. Passive worship is an oxymoron.

When I praise God even when I don't feel like it, when I get out of bed to worship when I'm tired, or when I help others when I am worn out, I am offering a sacrifice of worship to God.

The heart of the matter is a matter of the heart.

In happy moments, praise God. In difficult moments, seek God. In quiet moments, worship God. In painful moments, trust God. But in every moment, thank God!!!

To keep me from feeling distracted by what other people think, I take off my glasses now when I worship. Everybody around me is a big blur and I basically cannot see them. My focus is now off of the people around me and on my God! And I love Him with all my heart and soul!

Are you distracted?

Love is....

2009-08-10T22:18:00.001-05:00

Kindness
and
Patience
and
more stuff.
I haven't gotten to the more stuff yet. But I will get to that later.

Something I've realized very recently is that acting in love is the exact opposite of reacting in the flesh. Cogitate on that for awhile.

The rest of this is quoted from "Love as a Way of Life" by Gary Chapman.

The obvious competitor of patience is impatience. But what causes impatience? Pride causes us to react harshly to others. Pride says, "I am right and you are wrong. I want you to know how angry I am so you know how right I am. I can't be patient with you because that would be giving in, and you don't deserve that."

To quote Will Durant, "To speak ill of others is a dishonest way of praising ourselves." We often put others down through impatient remarks and angry rages in an unconscious effort to look better. We want to be recognized for how we have been inconvenienced, hurt, or mistreated.

When we wallow in self-righteous anger because we want others to notice that we are "better" than someone else, we are acting out of pride. Pride keeps us from seeing that the person we are angry with has just as much value as we do and that we are just as likely to make a mistake as anyone else. When we stubbornly focus on the error or weakness of someone else, we ignore what it will take to solve the problem at hand.

Patience gives us the freedom to let go of our need to be right all the time. It allows us the peace of putting relationships before the selfish desires that rob us of our joy.

The Heart of Worship is......

2009-08-10T14:43:00.006-05:00

.....total surrender to God!

This is quoted from "The Purpose Driven Life" by Rick Warren.

I know I've surrendered to God when I rely on God to work things out instead of trying to manipulate others, force my own agenda, and control the situation. I have to let go and let God. Instead of trying harder, I must trust more. I also know I've surrendered when I don't react to criticism and rush to defend myself.

It might take years, but I will eventually discover that the greatest hindrance to God's blessing in my life is not others, it is myself - my self-will, my stubborn pride and my own personal agenda. I cannot fulfill God's purpose for my life while focusing on my own plans.

I have to give it all to God: my past regrets, my present problems, my future ambitions, my goals, my fears, my dreams, my weaknesses, my habits, my hurts, my frustrations, my hang-ups. Nothing will ever be out of control while it is under His control. I have to tell myself to never be afraid. Mastered by Christ, I can handle anything.

Surrendering is never just a one time event. Paul said, "I die daily." There is a moment of surrender, and there is a practice of surrender, which is moment by moment and lifelong. I have to surrender my life over and over each day, sometimes uncountless times, sometimes 50 times a day. I must make it a daily habit. Jesus said, "If people want to follow me, they must give up the things they want. They must be willing to give up their lives daily to follow me."

And deciding to lead a totally surrendered life, I've already been tested. It also means doing inconvenient, unpopular, costly or seemingly impossible tasks. It has often mean't doing the opposite of what I feel like doing.

Now is my time to totally surrender - to God's grace, love and wisdom. I will be the first one to admit I need some help in totally surrendering to Him. It's a day by day process with which I'm still struggling.

Are you holding back from God?

I Want What You Have

2009-08-10T10:49:00.009-05:00

I was told that yesterday after the church service. I was hugging everybody after church. I went up to an elderly gentleman (name withheld for various reasons) in the service. I reached out to give him a hug. After he pulled back from me, he told me, "I want what you have!" He had tears in his eyes.

It struck me as being a little odd! What did I have that he could possibly want? I smiled and went on my way.

But now that I reflect back on it, that statement has struck a chord in my soul.

I have never viewed my life nor "what I have" as being wanted by another person. I had always trudged along in my life, desperately trying to make my way, doing the best that I could. For the last 14 years, my husband has been by my side, helping me along, getting us out of debt, helping me to raise 4 boisterous boys, pushing for what is best in our lives.

But that was why I did not have joy in my life...I was trudging along all by myself. Just recently, I tried to include a friend in my life, to share with her my ups and downs. We shared some parts of our lives with each other, but I still did not find joy. In my attempts to connect with her, she shoved me as far away from her that her arm could reach. My husband is a wonderful, responsible, loving man, but I still did not have that joy in my life. My husband has loved me through it all. I had always simply wanted somebody to love me and have a family...why wasn't I happy? Would I never be satisfied? In my past, I had tried all sorts of avenues, looking for that joy. Never did find it.

Where was the joy in life? I had been in and out of church for the past 41 years, had dabbled in the religion thing, had actually been baptized a couple of times. But I was officially saved 4 years ago with the conception of my baby boy, and I remember walking around the house singing, praising Him and feeling a joy that I had never felt before. But I have to honestly say, that the joy that I felt kind of wavered from time to time. I knew I was saved, that I had asked Jesus into my heart, but I never felt Him surrounding me in my life. I never honestly felt bathed in His love.

And just recently, I was starting to feel a depression coming on me again. Where was that dad gum joy that I so fervently seeked all my life? Where was it? Where was it? I knew that I was saved, but I questioned my salvation all the time. Was I doing this right or was I doing it wrong? I didn't have the motivation to read the bible on a daily basis, but I continued to try to live up to the standards set by Christ in the bible.

What was I doing wrong? Where was the joy?

And you know what? It was around me the whole time. I just didn't know it! I had not reached out and grabbed hold of it! But when I reached and received it, it was the most glorious and amazing feeling of joy that I had ever had in my life! This was what I had seeked and searched for my whole life!

It was the Holy Spirit that brought everything alive for me! It was the Holy Spirit that painted the picture of Christ being crucified on the Cross! It was the Holy Spirit that bathed me in joy! It was the Holy Spirit that lit a fire in me! It was the Holy Spirit that has given me a boldness to not be afraid to stand up for the Lord, not be afraid in my praise and worship, not be afraid to tell the world that I'm a child of God! It was the Holy Spirit that gave me what I have!

I now get it! By golly, after 41 years, I get it! I don't know why it took 41 years for me to reach out for that joy with God, but now I get it and I've received it! I think all those tests and trials that I've gone through in the past has made me a stronger person, because I have learned from them! That's what Paul said, "Grow strong in your weaknesses and troubles."

My friend so poignantly wrote to me, "Twinkle, Twinkle little star...do you hear it? Don't stop, Ronda!" Well, I'm still twinkling and I'm not stopping!

I used to be that apathetical worshipper. I used to sit in my designated pew in church, surrounded by my loving family. I had my boys on one side and my husband on the other side. I used to meekly, if ever, raise my hands in praise and worship.

Now that I have that joy and now that I get it, I will raise my hands high and sing with my whole soul and body! God deserves my praise from me! I listen when the pastor is preaching and I take notes! I sit at home and read the bible anytime that I can find time! I've got a fire lit in me and I'm not gonna let go! I can not let go because I DO NOT want the life that I led before! It was empty, without anything! Now my life is filled with God!

Actually, I saw in my friend something that I wanted, also. She had a fellowship with the Lord that I wanted, needed, seeked! But in my attempt to seek what she had, I shoved too hard and she shoved back. Now that I've got it, we can't share with each other our experiences. And I honestly don't know why!!! Hurt feelings, overstepping my bounds, smothering, somebody else involved, lack of communication...I don't know, the list could go on and on. But I want her to know that all I wanted was what she had, and now I have it! And God has an overabundance of it, he has enough for everybody! I want her to know that I still love her deeply as a friend and sister in Christ!

I'm reaching out to other people for friendship, but not in the same fervor that I was in the past.

I'm finding myself standing back and aloof for a reason. I've always been a quiet type of person, but now I understand why God made me that way. It makes me more watchful and observant of what is going on around me. It gives me the ability to listen to other people. I used to hate the fact that I was more of an introvert type of person...now I'm grateful for it. I'm reserved and quiet except when the Holy Spirit gets hold of me! I'm learning on a daily basis from revelations by reading the word why I'm supposed to be that way.

I've found my best friend in Jesus! He gave His life for me, what other friend would do that for me? Absolutely nobody! Except maybe my mother, of course. She loves me unconditionally, also! But Jesus actually died for me! His life was taken so that I could live! Does anybody else grasp what that really means??!! That means if a gun was pointed at me, that Jesus would have dived in front of the bullet to save my life! He loves me that much! It is as poignant and simple as that!

But let me also emphasize, I still make mistakes and stumble along and step on people's toes and say the wrong things. But it no longer steals from my joy! God's love is always there for me to receive no matter what I do wrong! And it's all because of Jesus and His sacrifice on the cross that I can ask God for His forgiveness when I stumble! I will always have that joy no matter how many mistakes I continue to make in my life! I will always have that relationship with God, all because of Jesus' sacrifice for me!

Now, I have people telling me that they want what I've got. I find it almost ironic! I now have what other people so desperately want in their lives. For 41 years I searched for it and now I have it and now other people are looking at me and wanting it!

The joy of the Lord can be in anybody's life ALL the time if they simply possess it, believe in Him and receive it! They can take possession of peace, power, righteousness, fruitullness, joy...but all they have to do is take it, go in and possess it. We don't have to fight for it anymore, Jesus already did that for us on the cross!

It is not my fault that you don't have joy or peace in your life! I can't factory make joy, but God can give it to me or to you! He has enough for all of us! And I've claimed my joy!

I receive my joy!

Do you have it?

My Dream

2009-08-09T15:54:00.005-05:00

Okay, I haven't had a dream in a few weeks...that I can remember and talk about and think about, anyways. But last night, I had one of my "unforgettable" dreams.

I had fallen asleep in the living room in my husband's recliner reading the bible.

I dream't that I was asleep in the living room in my husband's recliner. Does that make sense? I had actually fallen asleep there, but I was dreaming that I was asleep there, also.

And an evil spirit came in the living room. It started disarranging things in my house. It started wreaking havoc with everything in my house. And I immediately knew that it was doing this to create confusion when I woke up. I would be confused as to what had happened in my house while I was asleep. Confusion is a tool of the enemy!

But then this evil spirit started pointing to things and claiming them. It pointed to my furniture and stated, "Those are mine." It pointed to all my material things surrounding me and stated, "Those are mine." It pointed to the walls surrounding me in my house, stated, "This is mine."

But then it pointed to my baby sleeping in the recliner next to me and said, "He is mine."

I cried, "You may try to claim his body, but not his spirit. His spirit belongs to God!"

That was when I was scared so badly that I immediately woke up.

Of course, everything was in it's place and nothing was touched. But I took the baby and crawled into bed next to my strong husband.

The next morning I immediately remembered the dream and told my husband. He said with dreams like that you have to plead the name and blood of Jesus. But I don't remember to do that in my dreams. I guess I should have done it right after I woke up. But this afternoon after church, that's what I've been doing, rebuking the name and the power of the devil. Pleading the blood of Jesus over my children.

I see this dream in two ways.

One way is that it is satan's plan that he will start attacking my children. But I have to stop that attack before it ever starts! I need to stand on the Word of God and fight back on this spiritual attack! I've got to remain firm and resolute! I've got to put on my armor of God everyday, without fail and plead the blood of Jesus over my children!

Another interpretation that occured to me was what I've been learning about over the past month. That the material things in this world are in the dominion of the prince of darkness. Everything surrounding us has absolutely no meaning, albeit satan would love for us to place very high importance on our "wealth" and "stuff". And he knows how important my children are to me! He's trying to lay claim to them, but I will NOT relinquish their spirits to him!

Needless to say, this dream unnerved me last night and this morning. I've been told that satan's attacks will become more painful and harsh once he really gets started with me! Since I've gotten a precious gift, he wants to steal it and the joy that it has to offer me away from my heart! All I can do is continue to learn the word, get it ingrained in my heart and continue to rely on what Jesus did for me at the cross!

Or it could have just been a dream conjured up in my own imagination in my sleep! But I feel in my spirit that that was not the case!

Dear Lord above, I'm asking for Your help! As long as I know that You are by my side, I will not falter! And it states in Your Word, that You are always there beside me! And I will stand tall on Your Word!

Unity, Flesh and Love

2009-08-09T00:21:00.001-05:00

1 Corinthians 13:4-8

Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love never fails.

These verses are almost poetic.

I've heard these verses out of the bible quoted over and over again.

But let's take out the word love and add the word flesh.

The flesh is not patient, the flesh is not kind. It does envy, it does boast, it is proud. It is rude, it is self-seeking, it is easily angered, it keeps record of wrongs. The flesh does delight in evil and lies. It does not always protect, does not always trust, does not always hope, does not always persevere. The flesh always fails.

Kind of puts a new twist on it, huh? It did for me when my husband shed this new light on it for me tonight.

Paul so eloquently stated it when he said he had to die to the flesh every single day of his existence in this life. When you react in the flesh or deal with your life in the flesh, then you are not acting in love. And God is love!

And to be unified you have to act in love towards each other. There is no way that our church will be unified until it stops reacting in the flesh! I saw it in the kitchen while working with other members of the church...the gossiping, the rumors, the back stabbing...it's all evident in our church. My husband has seen it when speaking with other members.

But, let me emphasize also, that my husband and I are as guilty of it as others are. But it's very interesting to take an afternoon with fellow women of the church, not say a word, but just listen to everything going on around you and be totally shell shocked by what you hear being said!

I'm going to reiterate my question once again and then go to bed...

How are you gonna handle it? How are you gonna react? Are you gonna react to your persecutions in the flesh or with love?

it doesn't interest me what you do for a living

2009-08-07T22:08:00.003-05:00

I want to know what you ache for, and if you dare to dream of meeting your heart's longing. Is it God?

It doesn't interest me how old you are. I want to know if you will risk looking like a fool for God's love, for your dream, for the adventure of being alive with the Holy Spirit.

It doesn't interest me what planets are squaring your moon. I want to know if you have touched the center of your own sorrow, if you have been opened by life's betrayals and grown stronger in Christ for it or have become shriveled and closed from fear of further pain. I want to know if you can sit with pain, mine or your own, without moving to hide it or fade it or fix it.

I want to know if you can be with the Holy Spirit joy, if you can dance with wildness and let the Holy Spirit ecstasy fill you to the tips of your fingers and toes without cautioning us to be careful.
I want to know if you can bear the accusation of betrayal for God's name and not betray your faith; if you can remain faithful.

I want to know if you can see beauty, even when it's not pretty, every day, just as God see's beauty in everything.

I want to know if you can live with failure, yours and mine, and still stand on the edge of the lake and shout to God, "Thank you!"

It doesn't interest me to know where you live or how much money you have. I want to know if you can get up, after the night of grief and despair, weary and bruised to the bone, and do what needs to be done to feed the children and still raise your hands in praise of God.

It doesn't interest me who you know or how you came to be here. I want to know if you will stand in the center of the fire with me in the name of God and not shrink back.

It doesn't interest me where or what or with whom you have studied. I want to know what sustains you, from the inside, when all else falls away. Is it God?

I want to know if you can be alone with yourself and if you truly like the company you keep in the empty moments...God does!

What does it matter?

2009-08-07T20:29:00.002-05:00

What does it matter.....

........................................if a person comes to church wearing tattoos or body piercings?

........................................if a woman wears a dress to church?

........................................if a person does not show up to choir practice? Let him sing, for goodness sake!

........................................if a woman wears slacks to church? Let her sing in the choir, for goodness sake!

........................................if a woman wears makeup or not?

........................................if my son's sports teams win or not?

........................................if I drive a clunker vehicle or a fancy schmantcy car?

........................................if someone lives in a mansion or a double wide trailer?

........................................if someone has a beautiful smile or bad teeth?

........................................if my boys wear namebrand clothing or wal-mart brand?

........................................if a man wears his hair long?

........................................if someone is heavier than I am?

........................................if, if, if, if, if, if, the list could go on and on and on.

All these things focus on the outside! It is focusing on the material things of this world.

And not one of them matter one iota at all! Absolutely nothing of this world is important! Because all the things that we see, that we touch, that are around us right now are absolutely nothing! For it is the things that we cannot see right now, that we cannot touch right now that are the most important things to focus our thoughts! We cannot see the spiritual world, we cannot see Heaven, we cannot see God, Jesus nor the Holy Spirit. Aren't these things the most absolute important things? They are in my life. How about yours?

For what does God focus on in man? He looks at his heart and what is on the inside! The Holy Spirit deals with us and communes with us and talks with us on the inside! That is the most important part of man that concerns God...it has absolutely nothing to do with his outward appearance!

My outward appearance does not matter one iota to God at all!

So, why should anybody else's appearance matter to me? I HAVE, HAVE, HAVE to stop judging people by my initial impression. I will be the first one to admit that I make an initial judgement when I see someone. Is that person a bad person for having tattoos? Can that person not control their eating? Is my son's coach not doing a good job since they aren't winning?

I have to stop, take a deep breath and NOT JUDGE!

Dear Lord above, please help me to find the wisdom to not judge any person at all by their outward appearance! I know that I don't want to be judged, so I have to treat every person in the manner that I want to be treated! If I want to be loved, I have to show love! If I want to be respected, I have to show respect! For You love me for all my weaknesses, my frailties, my problems, my sins of the past and present, my iniquities. You do not judge me on the outside. You know me on the inside! Thank You for continuing to love me despite all the wrongs that I do!!

Hypocrite

2009-08-07T14:17:00.001-05:00

It was just revealed to me this morning that I reek and stink of hypocrisy!

What am I doing telling people what to do or not to do? I fall short every single day of my life, so what business do I have of telling them what to do when most of the time I don't do what I'm teaching?

But this is the real kicker...Is their relationship with God based on what they do or do not do? Is my relationship with my God based on what I do or do not do? Since my bible study time, my prayer time and my praising time in the morning was cut down to a minimum this past week due to the convention, does that mean God stepped back in my life this past week? Is it based on how much I do that reflects how much God loves me? So, does that mean on the days that I spend in doing His works, He loves me more and on the days when my schedule gets in the way that He loves me less? The answer is no, God loves me unconditionally for me, for who I am in His eyes!! So, how do I build up my relationship with God?

My relationship with God was opened when Christ was crucified on the cross. My salvation is a gift from God that I do not deserve. It was grace that God gave us when he gave His one and only Son to be crucified for our sins. The Almighty One gave me an undeserved gift and unmerited favor.

I've heard people from my church say that as soon as my fire burns out, I will be just like them. I will once again be apathetical in my worship! But I say phooey, the flow of the Holy Spirit is like an unendless supply of fuel, it never burns out! God the Father, God the Son and God the Holy Spirit will always be there, surrounding me and bathing me in His love. It never lessens from day to day, nor changed by whatever mood I'm in for that day, nor by what I do that day...He loves me wholeheartedly every single day of my life!

I have to live by the faith of the Son of God crucified on the cross so that I can have a relationship with God, so that I can have a free flowing of the Holy Spirit that is undeserved for me!

I have to live by my faith and not by my works!

I HAVE, HAVE, HAVE to stop judging people and preaching to them when I fall short of what I'm teaching every single day of my life!

I pray, dear God, to please help me remove this hypocrisy from my life! I have to stop focusing on what other people do and focus on You, Your grace and Jesus crucified and work on my relationship with YOU! Thank you, thank you, thank you, God, for the gift of Jesus on the cross so that I can talk one on one with You and have a relationship with You! Thank you for giving me the gift of depending on You!

My Helmet

2009-08-06T16:48:00.003-05:00

This is quoted from "Sparkling Gems from the Greek" by Rick Renner...

Ephesians 6:17....And take the helmet of salvation...

My salvation is the most precious and wonderful gift God ever gave to me!

When a person is confident of his salvation - and when he walks confidently in the powerful reality of all that salvation means for him - he is a noticeable individual! If you don't walk in all that your salvation entails, you may feel the brunt of the enemy's attack on your mind and steals your victory away.

If your salvation is not worn tightly around your mind like a helmet, the enemy will come to chop the multiple blessings of your salvation right out of your life. He will hack away at your foundation, telling you that healing, deliverance, preservation and soundness of mind were not really a part of Jesus' redemptive work on the Cross. By the time the enemy is finished with your mind, you will question your salvation.

Many believers try to do the work of God without making it a personal goal to walk in the full knowledge of their salvation, and they are spiritually slaughtered as a result. By exposing their unprotected minds to the devil's insinuations, they place themselves in a position to be severly attacked and possibly deceived.

You see, the devil knows that if he can seize your mind and fill it with lies, he can then begin to operate from this lofty position in your life. He can try to manipulate your emotions, send signals of sickness and disease into your body, and so on. To protect you from such attacks is the very reason God has given you the "helmet of salvation."

The fact that Paul likens our salvation to a helmet means that we must know all that our salvation includes inside and out. We must spend time studying what the Bible has to say about healing, about our deliverance from evil powers, about God's desire to bless us, and about the benefits of our redemption in our everyday lives.

Once this becomes ingrained in our spirits, it becomes like a helmet in our lives!

At that point, it doesn't matter how hard the devil tries to hack away at our spiritual foundation; we know beyond a shadow of a doubt what Jesus' death and resurrection purchased for us. This knowledge has become a part of us, preventing the enemy from attacking our minds as he did in the past. That's how the full knowledge of our salvation puts a helmet on our heads!

Lord, I am so ever grateful for my salvation! It is the most precious gift You have ever given me. It changed my life and set me free; it brought deliverance to my spirit! I want to wrap my salvation around my mind so tightly that the devil can never steal these benefits from my life. Holy Spirit, I ask You to help me study and to understand everything Jesus purchased for me at the Cross. Reveal it to me; convince me of its truth; and help me to wear that revelation knowledge on my head like a mighty fortified, spiritual helmet!

I pray this in Jesus' precious, holy and magnified name!

Fleeced

2009-08-06T07:13:00.008-05:00

This is quoted from "How You Can Be Led by the Spirit of God" by Kenneth Hagin.

Sometimes I'm guilty of putting out a fleece when I pray. It saves me some time praying and getting alone and waiting on God, just to put out my fleece. I have been guilty of asking God for a physical sign to make a decision or to see what He has planned for me!

In putting out a fleece, I pray something like this, "I'll do x,y,z if God shows me a certain sign." Or "God if you want me to do this, You must show me with a sign." Or "Lord, shut this door, or open that door."

Some of those doors the devil might open or he might shut himself. They are on his territory. The Bible calls him the god of this world (2 Cor 4:4). Satan can move in the sense realm. He's the prince of this fleshy world.

Sometimes praying like this works, but sometimes a door is opened that in retrospect you wish you had never crossed the threshhold.

God has a better way of leading His children than a hit-and-miss method. Romans 4:14 does not say, "For as many as are led by fleeces, they are the children of God." It says that we be led by the Spirit of God!

"Yes," someone argues, "but Gideon put out a fleece in the Old Testament."

Didn't Jesus die to give us a new covenant? Why in the world would I want to go back to the old covenant? Jesus died for me so that I can be spiritually alive. The old covenant is for spiritually dead people. I am not spiritually dead. I have the Spirit of God living in me and it makes me alive!

Remember Gideon was not a prophet, a priest or a king. Only those, under the old covenant, were anointed by the Spirit of God.

The Shechinah Glory, the Presence of God, was kept shut up in the Holy of Holies. But when Jesus died on Calvary, the curtain that curtained off the Holy of Holies was rent in twain from top to bottom - and God moved out. He dwells in us!

I no longer put out fleeces. I'm learning to pray and wait on God. I'm learning to talk to God long enough until I know right on the inside what to do! I have the Holy Spirit living inside of me and I'm learning to wait for His directions!

Sometimes in my prayers, I don't get an immediate response in my spirit. It may take days or weeks for me to get that response! I need to work on my patience in waiting for that response! Sometimes I jump forward with both feet, following my own agenda! And sometimes I really hurt the feelings of people without intending to do that! I need to wait, wait, wait, wait until I get either the green light or the red light in my spirit!

Dear God, please give me the patience that I so direly need in talking and praying with You! Thank you, once again and again and again for forgiving me of the mistakes that I make on a daily basis! Thank you for Jesus' and His gift to me! I fall short of your glory every single day that I breathe! Please help to me to see what the Holy Spirit is telling me and to drop my agenda at your feet!

Love as a Way of Life

2009-08-03T10:08:00.004-05:00

I've been reading this book by Gary Chapman entitled "Love as a Way of Life". I'm simply reading it because God is love. Therefore, I need to make love a part of my everyday life.

And he states in this book, that love starts out with kindness.

Am I kind in my everyday life?

Sometimes I'm in a rush in the grocery store and fail to say anything to the grocery store clerk.

Sometimes I'm in a rush while driving and get frustrated with slow drivers.

Sometimes my children hurt each other and I don't respond with any type of kindness at all.

So, the answer to this question is no, not all the time.

So, what can I do?

Start being kind in every aspect of my life.

Here is Gary Chapman's list and mine combined to start doing kind things in my life:

Give a store clerk a compliment.
Hold the door open for someone.
Let the person in line behind you at the grocery store check out first.
When going through McDonald's drive thru, pay for the person's order behind you as well as your own.
Tip people well.
Take a friend out to lunch.
Stop at a child's lemonade stand and buy yourself a drink.
Send an e-mail to your friends asking how you can help them out in the upcoming busy week.
If you notice a co-worker excelling at his job, look for an opportunity to tell your boss.
Share an umbrella with someone while it's raining.

The list could go on and on. Please feel free to add to it!

Thank you, God, for giving me the opportunity to show Your love through my acts of kindness!

if

2009-08-03T08:17:00.003-05:00

In the middle of the word Life is the word if.

What does that mean in respect to my life?

In the middle of my life is a big if......

If I want life.....

.......................... I have to accept Christ.

.......................... I have to remain faithful.

.......................... I have to follow God's word.

.......................... I have to have love in my life.

.......................... I have to be forgiving.

.......................... I have to ask forgiveness.

.......................... I have to rely on the Lord.

Thank you, God, for another beautiful day to test my faith in You! I gladly put on my armor of God every morning, my helmet of salvation, breastplate of righteousness, loins of truth, shield of faith, shod my feet with the gospel of peace, and my sword of God's word!

I pray this in Jesus' holy and precious name!

2 Timothy 4:2 - Remain Steadfast

2009-08-01T15:19:00.006-05:00

2 Timothy 4:2 - Preach the world; be instant in season, out of season . . .

This is quoted from "Sparkling Gems from the Greek" by Rick Renner...

Paul wrote this second letter to Timothy during a tumultuous time during Timothy's ministry. At first, the church was thriving and growing. Timothy was a young new pastor whom everybody loved! Those earlier years in the church were moving and exciting!

But during the time that Second Timothy was written, Nero had become the emperor of Rome and his insanity was wreaking havoc in believer's lives. He declared that Christians be purged and made an example to all other believers. The Roman government intended to scare them back into the old pagan temples.

Many believers died for their faith. Others returned to the old temples to save their lives. Timothy also had to deal with rebellion among some of his church leaders.

Paul urged Timothy to "be instant in season, out of season..."

The word "instant" is the Greek word ephistimi, which is a compound of the word epi and istimi. The word epi means upon, and the word istimi means to stand. Compounded into one word, the new word means to stand upon, as to take a firm stand or a hard position.''

Paul told him to take a firm stand at his position "in season, out of season." This looks like a play on words, but it is a very powerful statement to those of us who are doing our best to serve God. The words "in season" come from the Greek word eukairos and the words "out of season" come from the Greek word akairos.

The word kairos is the Greek word that means seasons or times. And eu added as a prefix to it means good or happy times. And "a" added as a prefix to it means bad times.

So when Paul told him, "Be instant in season and out of season," he was really telling him to be faithful and remain steadfast, whether he was having happy times or bad times.

What kind of season are you going through right now? Is it a happy season? Or are you experiencing hard times? If it's bad times, this is not the time for you to run in fear. Since God has called you, it's time for you to dig in, take a firm stand and resolve that you are going to be faithful whether times are good or bad.

I assure you that the bad times will eventually pass. Dark clouds never last. Wouldn't it be a shame if you gave up and sacrificed everything you've worked so hard to gain because of some bad times that you might be experiencing?

Jesus is with you. He will give you the strength you need to stand tall and to remain faithful. He will do His part, but only you can do your part. What is your part? To stay faithful!

Lord, I receive this word today as strength for my life. I'm not going to let the devil or my circumstances chase me away from where I know I need to be. It's been very difficult, but this season will pass - and when it does, I'll be stronger, wiser and more equipped for the future. I thank You for your glorious word!

I pray this in Jesus' name!

Are you passing?

2009-07-31T21:57:00.004-05:00

I know that life is a test, the Bible is my textbook to study, Christ is my teacher, my prayers are my ways of asking for help and the Holy Spirit is my aide. I know that in the end it's either a pass or fail (no in between grades) to salvation. I pass if I've accepted Christ, keep my eyes on God, learn from Christ's teachings and follow them and fill my heart with love! If I keep the Holy Spirit as my mentor and listen to Him, I can assess my progress during this testing process. The only way to salvation and passing the test is through Christ!

How are you doing on your test?

2 Corinthians Chapter 12 - How Are You Gonna Handle It?

2009-07-30T18:48:00.007-05:00

Read verses 1-11.

This is basically Paul telling about his vision or dream that he had of going to heaven.

And after this experience, after seeing what he saw, all he could talk about was taking joy in your weaknesses, your insults, your distresses, your persecutions, your difficulties for Christ's sake, for when you are weak, then you are strong. He did not describe what he saw (and what he saw had to be breathtaking) but all he could talk about was taking joy in weaknesses for then you become strong. This had to be a pretty important point since he was talking about it rather than the glorious sights that he had seen. He was really vague about what he saw.

My husband and I have been studying on this for quite some time now. He had been woken in the middle of the night with this story on his heart about a week before June 27. We couldn't really understand how a person could take joy in their weaknesses, their failures. It didn't make sense to us. Especially to me, since I was struggling with a desperate weakness from my past and I certainly wasn't taking joy in it. How could I? It was my darkest hour. How could I take joy in it?

And then I had my experience on June 27 and all things have taken on a real meaning for me. My past was taken from me and laid in Christ's lap.

And toward the end of last week, it all clicked for me.

You've got to swallow your pride in order to take joy in your persecutions. You've got to handle it with a Christ like mind to take it without dealing with it in the flesh, without it angering you or disheartening you. Pride is of the flesh and that is exactly how Satan would love for you to react.

Let's take it a step further, if you swallow your pride and you learn from your mistakes, your weaknesses, your failures, then you can take joy in the fact that it is making you stronger in Christ's love. For when you learn from your failures, then you gain strength, it makes you a more powerful person in Christ. Do not be fooled by apparent failures. There is such a thing as successful failures...failures in which you learn from your mistakes and weaknesses. Your failures can either make you bitter or better! It helps you grow in Christ! And you can gain joy from it! I certainly gain joy from knowing that I am growing stronger in Christ!

And then this afternoon, this revelation came on my heart...Satan will always be there to attack me. How will I handle it? Will I handle it in the flesh...with anger, disappointment, heartache, devestation? Or will I handle it with the Holy Spirit...by learning from Christ's teaching in the word and handling it with a Christ like mind? With a oneness of mind with Christ? For when I learn, I grow stronger. And when I learn, I also find joy!

In the past, I handled everything that came my way with the flesh, with my feelings. Even after getting my gift, I still struggled with handling things in the flesh. It will be a constant struggle for me, but hopefully as I learn new things, I will become more adept at walking with the Holy Spirit. Satan will always be there to tempt me to react with my flesh, but as I grow and learn in the word, the Holy Spirit will be more and more evident in my thoughts, actions and words.

Am I gonna handle my insults, persecutions, distresses, difficulties with the flesh or with the mind of Christ? Am I gonna learn and grow from them so that I can walk with Christ?

Thank you, God, for giving me the gift of the Holy Spirit to guide me in my walk! I thank you for teaching me how to walk with the Holy Spirit rather than in the flesh! I want to thank you for your instructions on life, the Holy Bible!

Bible Studies - God's plan for me

2009-07-30T14:43:00.005-05:00

Okay, I'm starting to really absorb the word it into my heart. I'm reading everyday and learning new things and getting revelations on an almost daily basis.

One way for me to help get it absorbed into my heart is to write it down also. So, I'm going to start using my blog to write about what the Lord has written on my heart that day.

John 10:10 The thief cometh not, but for to steal, and to kill and to destroy: I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly.

The word thief comes from the Greek word klepto, which means to steal, a bandit, pickpocket, or thief who is so artful in the way that he steals that his exploits of thievery are nearly undetectable.

Jesus uses this word to let us know the devil is very cunning in the way he steals from people. He knows that if he does it outright, his actions will be recognized; therefore, he steals from people in such a deceptive way that he often accomplishes his evil goal before they even know he has stolen from them.

Just as a kleptomaniac has a persistent, neurotic impulse to steal, the devil can't stop stealing because it is his impulse and very nature to steal.

Not only does the thief come to steal, but Jesus said that he also comes "to kill". At first glance, it appears that this means to kill, as to take someone's life. But the Greek word is thuo, which means to sacrifice. Because Jesus uses this word to describe the work of the thief, He is telling us that if the thief hasn't already walked away with everything that we hold precious and dear, he will then try to convince us that we need to sacrifice or give up everything that he hasn't already taken from us.

The thief cannot bear the fact that you possess any kind of blessing. Therefore, if he is unsuccessful at stealing the good things from your life, he will try to cunningly convince you to give up everything that you possess and love - simply because he doesn't want you to have it.

Then Jesus went on to say that the thief also comes "to destroy". By using this word, we discover that if the thief is unsuccessful in his attempts to steal from you or convince you to sacrifice what you hold dear, he will then try to ruin it, lay it to waste, trash it, devastate it or totally destroy it.

And what would your reaction to this be? My initial reaction in the flesh is to be totally angry or emotionally devestated or with some sort of feeling that is not what God teaches. Remember, God is love! It's all about how you handle it because Satan will always be there attacking you from all sides! God teaches us how to handle such attacks...become of the same mind as Christ. Learn through Christ's teachings. You can either become bitter or better! You have to learn through your mistakes, stumbling blocks or weaknesses to become a much stronger person in Christ! Never be fooled by apparent failures! There is such a thing as successful failures, as long as you have learned what God wants you to glean from it and become a much stronger person, following God's word through your mistakes. And in that way you can find joy in your failures and weaknesses!

And that previous paragraph, ladies and gentlemen, comes from listening to my pastor preach a sermon one Sunday, from a Women of Faith conference that I attended, from listening to my husband as he reads the bible and from my personal reading of the bible. I think it is really powerful that all 4 of them come together like this! It makes for a marvelous meshing of what I've been learning over time!

Jesus went on to say, "...I am come that they might have life, and that they might have it more abundantly." The words "they might have" are from the Greek tense that means to have and to continually possess eternally. The word "abundantly" is from the Greek word periossos, and it means to be above, beyond what is regular, extraordinary or even exceeding. This is not just abundance, is is super-abundance.

What a comparison! The devil comes to steal, to kill and to destroy, but Jesus comes to give life as we have never known it, eternal life in glorious splendor, in wondrous amazement that we cannot even begin to fathom!

So, now that you know the devil wants to make your life unhappy, wants to wiggle into your personal affairs so that he can walk off with everything you hold precious and dear, and then for you to react in the flesh when dealing with it, what are you going to do about it? I urge you to put on the brakes and stop Satan from wreaking havoc in your life. Jesus will give you the power to resist every attack and to overcome every strategy the devil ever tries to use against you.

Lord, I am so thankful that You are patient with me as I learn to walk in the Holy Spirit and to produce the fruit of the Spirit in my life. I thank you for opening my eyes to the truth. I am so thankful that You came to give me real spiritual eternal life. Forgive me for being too tolerant of Satan's attacks and not recognizing them for what they are. Forgive me for getting in the flesh when dealing with these attacks. Teach me to hate sin! Show me how to say no to ungodliness and to yield my mind and body as instruments of righteousness. After what You have shown me today, I never want to be the same!

I pray this in Jesus' name!

Mini Vacation

2009-07-22T17:30:00.007-05:00

Isn't it nice to take more than one vacation during the summer? In going to visit my Mom-in-Law in Branson for her to get some quality time with her grandsons, she treated us to a second vacation! We got to spend some time in Castle Rock motel and included in it's amenities is an indoor waterpark...right down my boy's alley! It is a brand new motel in Branson that they just opened up in March! My boys have had a blast so far! Here are some of the pics via my Mom's camera:

A pic of the boy's at breakfast this morning in the motel's restaurant:

A pic of my baby enjoying the water! He didn't discover this lifejacket until it was almost time for us to leave, but he fell in love with it's security that it offered!

A pic of Matthew enjoying some water splashing on his head!

James relishing in his brother's splashing!

Matthew had this inner tube ride down to a science! He was the one that landed right side up at the bottom most of the time! And it was a really fast slide down! And yes, Mom even rode it! And loved it!

Thank you, God, for giving me some precious time with my boys before they grow up! And for the precious time that I still have left with my wonderful Mom-in-Law!

Holy Chaperoning

2009-07-20T09:47:00.000-05:00

I swore I wouldn't write on my blog for a long time. But this weekend was absolutely wonderful and I just had to share it.

We camped at our favorite camping spot, Alley Springs. The weather was so awesome. Not too hot for being in the middle of July! It was fairly cool in the evenings, perfect weather for sleeping outside!

When we pulled in to Alley, we didn't have a campsite reserved because they were completely booked online as of last week. So, my husband was filling up the camper with water, expecting not to have water or electric. But someone pulled behind him, figured out what he was doing and invited him to spend the weekend in a campsite that she had reserved but was not occupying. And to think we wouldn't have gotten that campsite if we had left Thursday evening as we had originally planned but it was raining the moment that we planned on pulling out the driveway so we opted to leave Friday morning. The Lord was blessing us!

It was probably one of the most enjoyable camping trips that I can remember. The boys are getting big enough to ride around on bicycles with me. John John will be riding around with us in a couple of years.

Randy and my dad took the boys floating in the canoe. They took John John on a mini excursion from one side of the bridge to the other side. Isaac took the longest float on a 3 hour float. Matthew's float was for 45 minutes. James opted out of the long float, so he took the mini excursion float also. They all had a good time floating and swimming in the river.

We all got a lot of sunshine on our faces! We came back with somewhat red faces.

What made this camping trip so much more enjoyable? Was it due to the spectacular weather? Was it due to the fact that the boys are getting older? Was it due to the fact that we set up our small tent for the boys to sleep in, so we weren't wading through a bunch of sleeping bodies in the middle of the night? Was it due to our camping site? Was it due to camping in our most absolute favorite campground? In all actuality, I think it was due to the fact that we were chaperoned by the Holy Spirit! And that made all the difference in the world!

Thank you God for such a refreshing and wonderful weekend! I didn't take my camera with me, so I have no pics to share!

Sweet Treats

2009-07-08T23:40:00.005-05:00

I made some homemade blackberry cobbler and ice cream! Mmmmmmm, good! Finger lickin' good, to be exact!

Starting to enjoy some garden stuff! These tomatoes are the sign that my salsa canning season is nigh!

And I couldn't leave off the pic of my "sweetness" sound asleep with a toy Woody hat bestowed on his wee head by one of his brothers!

Thank you God for all the little sweet treats in my life!

My Sign from God...

2009-07-06T10:36:00.002-05:00

...used to be frogs. You see, when I was in a desperate hour of my life, there was a frog clinging to a window screen at my house. I tried to flick him off, but he stayed. I honestly thought it was God's way of telling me that he was looking out for me through the eyes of that little frog. But in clinging to those little frog symbols, I also was clinging to a dead me.

But God's real sign for me is living and breathing right in front of me! He was an answer to my prayers that I so desperately needed at that time in my life! Little did I know at that moment in time, that he would be my turn-a-round point.

My sign from God is my baby boy! He is the richest blessing from God above! All 4 of my boys are miracles and wonders sent from God! And John John was a blessing sent down from God in answer to my desperation and pain at the time! I used to question why God sent the most wonderful boys to a mother who questioned everything, who was so sad and down, who felt so unworthy. But now I know...he sent them to a woman of God who rejoices in her salvation and praises her King and knows that she IS WORTHY of His love.

Thank you, God, for my wonderful and loving family during my times of need and pain! Thank you for helping me to find wisdom and guidance through friends and family that are knowledgeable in the word. I'm learning everyday and absorbing your word into my heart and soul.

Two Very Important People...

2009-06-23T05:33:00.004-05:00

...in my life are my Mom and Mom-in-law.

Thank you, God, for giving me two strong women to emulate my life after and to listen to!

Vacation Progression Via Pictures

2009-06-21T23:27:00.027-05:00

I need to get this over with so that I can start blogging again. I have so many pics to choose from to display on my blog to represent our trip that I've been neglecting my blog because the task seems so daunting. So, I've randomly chose some beautiful scenery shots and leave it at that. So, ladies and gentlemen, sit back and relax on this segment of the tour and please look to your left and see:

And that, ladies and gentlemen, concludes this segment of the tour. If you would, please exit to your right!

Almost Home

2009-06-01T22:54:00.002-05:00

I am so homesick right now!

Everybody's starting to be not in a very good mood! There's a lot of snapping going on in the vehicles right now! It's time to head home!

Gearing up for the looooooooooong

D
R
I
V
E

home through Kansas tomorrow!

Gonna be home late tomorrow night!

Thank you, God, for the wonderfully safe trip! The scenery shows Your artistry at it's finest!

Pushing the Limits

2009-05-27T07:30:00.002-05:00

Okay, I don't have much time to write about what's going on...I'm supposed to get all the suitcases in the van and meet my husband at the campsite in about 15 minutes.

Yesterday, we drove on a mountain trail ridge road. We quickly discovered that Matthew has an almost incapacitating fear of heights! He was okay to 11,760 feet, but the higher we drove the more he paniced! We didn't make it all the way through the loop. We had to turn around and go back. But the bad part about it is the fact that we have to drive back over that road to go to our destination of Steamboat Springs, CO. So, I guess we will have to blindfold, Matthew! I'm also feeling a little leary about driving over the same road today because I'm going to be behind the wheel this go around! Yesterday, I was sitting in the middle seat enjoying the scenery. This time, we are taking the whole caravan and moving to a new destination. So, please pray for me while I'm driving on a road where there is absolutely nothing on both sides of you but air!

On a different note, this is the first time ever since camping as a family for the past 14 years that I've opted out of camping. It was 25 degrees the previous night, raining and sleeting on and off the whole day! When it's that cold, all you want to do is climb in your sleeping bag and get warm! We were sitting in the vehicles yesterday just to stay warm! That was the first time that camping was no fun at all! So, my husband talked me into going to a motel last night with my mom and the 4 boys! We are warm at last! Randy and my dad opted to stay at the campsite! They are toughing it out!

Gotta go! Don't have time to post any pics! But we have seen some very majestic and spectacular scenery!

Thank you, Lord, for keeping us safe! I pray that you continue to do so!

Gotta love....

2009-05-24T22:36:00.007-05:00

technology in today's traveling world! I remember when my husband and I started taking vacations over 14 years ago, we had two CB's in the vehicles. Man, times have changed!

Not only do we have walkie talkies to communicate between us, but we have cell phones to talk if the walkie talkies don't work that well. We also have a GPS to use instead of map reading. I was always my husband's map reader in the vehicle, whether I was sitting next to him or in the back of the vehicle shouting out directions to him. Ineveitably, at least once during the trip, I would tell him to take a certain turn about two seconds after he was supposed to turn. And we would have to make the U-turn to get back on track again. This is the first vacation where we have utilized our GPS and I absolutely love it! A couple of glitches here and there, but overall, it works out great! And then to take my laptop and hook up to wi-fi at a motel, well that's icing on the cake!

I'm starting to feel the exhaustion of driving for 14 hours today, but here is our first day in a nutshell.

This picture is what I stared at for about 80% of the time, the back of the trailer that my husband was driving.

We drove through all of Kansas with my husband in front. Except in Kansas City, where my husband had me take the lead because I had our GPS and she navigated us through it like an old pro. And also in Colorado Springs so that I could lead him to the motel.

We ran into some storms when we turned off of I-70 at Limon, CO.

This is my husband's lead vehicle pulled off of the side of the road so that our oldest son could relieve his bladder after drinking a lot of water to alleviate any symptoms of altitude sickness.

We made it fine to our destination in Colorado Springs, in amongst all the raindrops falling on us from Limon to Colorado Springs.

But the funniest quote of the day was when the baby was holding his walkie talkie in his hand. He was pushing buttons on it and pretending like he was talking on it. I talked on another one asking my husband a question. John John pointed to the walkie talkie in his hand, looked at Matthew and asked, "How did Mommy get in there?" Some fun stuff and memories!

Thank you Lord for providing us with a safe trip to Colorado! Expecting some majestic scenery tomorrow!

Heading Out The Door!

2009-05-23T22:40:00.003-05:00

Okay, I don't have a whole lot of time to write a lot. I need to get in bed right now! But just wanted to touch base and let you know that we are heading out the door early tomorrow morning for vacation! So, I won't be on my blog for over a week.

But I am looking forward to seeing some majestic scenery! And camping out in the mountains! And getting to ride on a passenger train where you look out and there is nothing but air on both sides of the rails! And seeing some wonderful scenery in the desert in Utah! I am a little concerned about altitude sickness, though, because we have heard to beware of it from more than one friend. Hopefully, we can keep a reign on those symptoms!

Well, night, night all!

Dear Lord, please keep my family safe on this wonderful trip that we have planned! Please put angels all around our vehicles and keep us safe from all those non caring drivers in the world! Also, please keep us safe from critters while we are camping out in the mountains! Thank you, Lord, for giving us the opportunity to see your majestic beauty first hand!

I've got an....

2009-05-13T20:57:00.003-05:00

...itsy, bitsy yellow polka dot sock eater in my laundry! That's my conclusion that I've come to, anyways! Look at that pile of mismatched socks!

And I can't throw a mismatched sock away! I've also come to the conclusion that if the sock can't be found in the laundry, it will turn up underneath beds, crammed in toys, underneath couches, underneath pillows and blankets on the bed...I've also found them in the fridge and in the trash can! They can turn up anywhere at all! So, when I eventually do find them, I will still have the other matching sock!

But, alas, in my endeavor to be thrifty and hold onto all my mismatched socks, my pile is ever growing bigger and bigger! Wonder how many sock puppets I can make??!!

Headin' toward....

2009-05-10T16:52:00.004-05:00

COLORADO!

If I had my druthers, we would be traveling in a Volkswagon Bus, pulling a little travel trailer behind us! Now, that would be stylin'! But, alas, we will be taking our camping vehicle pulling our hillbilly camper behind us!

We are leaving early in the morning on May 24 and headin' west! We will be gone until June 2!

As is typical on our family vacations, we will be driving by the seat of our pants...meaning wherever our little hearts tell us to go once we get headed in the westwardly direction, that will be where we end up for the day! We would (or I should say, "I would") like to see a little bit of the Grand Canyon! But we will see if we can fit that into our time frame!

It's always a big deal in our family to pick out our family vacation spot for the summer! This go around, my husband was really pushing Colorado, so that's where we are planning on going! A couple of years ago, I just placed my finger on a United States map and landed at Galveston, TX! And that's where we went for that summer! That vacation was a little bit stressful and hectic for me because I was still nursing John John. Can you imagine me out of my seat belt, bent over the car seat, nursing a baby?! That's what I did for a majority of the trip! It didn't matter that I didn't have my seat belt on as long as the baby was strapped down in his car seat! I bet it was quite the sight for the Average Joe driving along the highway beside us!

Colorado or Bust!

Funny Baby Quote

2009-05-07T16:53:00.002-05:00

After John threw up for the first time while camping this past weekend, he looked at me all teary eyed.

He said in the most pitiful voice, "Mommy, me blow up."

Kickoff of the Camping Season

2009-05-04T21:18:00.023-05:00

This was the picture of our camping on Friday night...with the grill a smokin' sitting on the picnic table. Albeit was wet, rainy and a tad bit on the chilly side, it was good for all of us to getaway for a couple of days! Some quality family time well spent, I say!

On Friday, we got there and it was raining and cold! So, we had to spend time inside the camper! Now that the boys are getting bigger, it's getting a bit cramped when we are all in there! But the minute it slacked off, the boys were outside riding their bikes, playing in mud puddles, riding scooters, just being little boys. My Matthew went through 3 sets of clothes in a period of 2 hours...he got soaked head to toe in mud twice. Oh well, that's what little boys do!

Friday night, my husband was spending time visiting with his brother while we all got ready for bed. By the time he joined us in the camper, he had to jockey for his position in bed and for his pillow with so many growing boys finding places to sleep in the camper! You snooze you lose, buddy!

On Saturday, both Ija and Matthew caught their limit of trout in the morning. Randy said that James is way too active to be a fisherman, at least right now at this stage in his life! So, the fish that our two older boys caught fed us Saturday night! Way to go, boys!

After they were done fishing, we went target shooting with pellet guns and bows and arrows, hiking, feeding the fish, playing on the playground to appease the baby...a typical boy's fun day filled with lots of activity!

Saturday night, all 4 campers in our group gathered at one campground and had a group supper! It was fun with all the chatting, visiting and eating!

Also, the 3 older boys spent the night Saturday night in Uncle Dave's camper which is bigger than ours! That was a good thing since I had a sick baby on my hands who was throwing up all over me and himself all throughout the night! I think he caught what his older brother had a couple of days before the campout! He threw up a total of 8 times throughout the night...I did not get a whole lot of sleep that night! But Randy and I learned that we need to bring our smaller tent for the older boys to sleep in because our camper is not getting any bigger but our boys are growing bigger and bigger.

Sunday morning, we got up, ate a pancake breakfast and packed up all the gear! The boys were disappointed that we were leaving already to go home!

Needless to say, I've had a lot of laundry to do...with a baby being sick, and the mud from a rainy weekend and also for being gone for 3 days. I usually do 2 or 3 loads of laundry a day just to keep caught up with it, so being gone does me absolutely no good in keeping up with my laundry.

And this last picture just shows ya that you gotta not be afraid of mud or dirt while camping! These are my dirty covered toes that I took a picture of!

But I gotta say, camping is good for the soul! Thank you Lord for the opportunity to draw my family closer together during these times!

Missing Somebody Immensely

2009-05-01T10:02:00.002-05:00

Just stepped out of the shower and missed hearing the pitter patter of little feet! I'm missing my baby, tremendously!

You don't realize what an impact somebody has on your life until their presence is gone! He is my buddy 24/7! We are like peanut butter and jelly. Wherever I am, he is always there with me! We do everything together! We go to the bathroom together (I've not used the bathroom by myself for the past 10 years), we sleep together (when he gets up in the middle of the night and crawls into our bed with my husband and I), we eat together, play together, sing together! He is my pal, my confidante, my bestest buddy! I've had a baby in the house for the past 10 years! What will I do when he starts school? I will HAVE to find a job outside of the home or go back to school because these 4 walls will close in on me without hearing the pitter patter of little feet around the house!

Just wanted to let you know that I was feeling lonely this morning!

But that will soon change as the day progresses! We are "going camping and fishing" in the infamous words of the baby! The whole family will get together this afternoon!

Thank you, God, for John! I know without a shadow of a doubt that he was a personal gift from You to me!

Camping Adventure

2009-04-30T19:37:00.006-05:00

It is very difficult to stand in your driveway, waving goodbye to 3 of the most precious gifts that you have in your life.

My husband, oldest son and the baby just now left in our camping trailer to go ahead of the rest of us to set up camp tonight for our camping adventure over the weekend. My husband took the baby just because he wanted to and he took our oldest son because he had a fever today and the nurse wouldn't let him back in school tomorrow.

I don't think I've prayed so hard in my life as I did when they drove away. I prayed that the angels would protect that vehicle as it drove down the rode with so many uncaring drivers out there in the world today. I prayed that the good Lord would provide them with a safe path to their destination. And I know he is doing that just as I speak right now.

So, now I'm alone home with my two middle boys! I've got everything packed and ready to go, so now it's just a matter of waking up tomorrow morning, sending the boys off to school, going to the grocery store to pick up some last minute items, picking them up from school early and heading towards the campground!

This is the initial start of our camping season! The boys are really excited! The baby has been asking for the last 3 weeks, "Going camping and fishing?" He is now officially on his camping trip! We are to follow tomorrow!

As a family, we have made many memories while camping. We've gone on a family vacation every summer for at least a week, sometimes 2 weeks, and we've always camped during our vacations! Sometimes we've mixed camping with motels, but we've always camped on all of our vacations! We have traveled all over the United States via camping as a family, and I absolutely love it! And I'm certain that the boys are making lots of good memories during those family trips!

Thank you, God, for blessing me with a family that loves being outdoors in all Your Glory!

Family Progression via Pictures

2009-04-21T21:03:00.039-05:00

I got the idea to do this from reading Kimberly's blog. Thanks for posting all your Easter pics over the years! It was really neat to see your family in the early years when I wasn't around! So, I decided to post all the pics I could find of our family over the years to give a visual roundup of our family progression.

1997
Before we started having children. Enjoying some white water rafting on the Ocoee River in Tennessee. Some mighty powerful white water in this river since it was used as a training river for Olympic white water kayaking!

1998

Oct. 5. Isaac would be born 18 days later.

1998

Isaac as a newborn with my Grandpa, who died shortly after this picture was taken.

1999.

I distinctly remember this picture. I had taken my first son to my hometown's festival to show him off. I was a proud momma!

2000

Our first house that we ever built.

2002

I was pregnant with James, I just didn't know it when this picture was taken. Isaac was in preschool at this time in Republic, MO.

2002

Our family christmas picture. I was pregnant with James. At this point in time, I thought I was in complete control of my life.

2003

This was Thanksgiving at my mother-in-laws. It was Christmas of this year, 2003, when we made the dreaded move to a strange town with nary a soul that I knew at all. I was surrounded by strangers that I could not trust. The move was not what I needed in my life at that time. But in the end, I think it was the best thing for us to do. God knew it would be the best move for us in the long run.

2004

Christmas at my mother-in-law's.

2005

Christmas at my Mom & Dad's. I'm the one in the middle. We had just learned that I was pregnant with John. By this time, we had built our new house, had moved into it and away from a rental house.

2006

Camping in Arkansas. I only had 2 more months to go in my final pregnancy.

2006

At the hospital with newborn John.

2007

Easter at my Mom & Dad's. I'm the one on the far left.
2007

Christmas at our house. If you couldn't pick me out, I'm the only girl in the picture! ;>)

2007

The Stair Stepped family. One of these days, these boys will tower over me just like their Daddy!

2008

I am a new strong woman in Christ's love for me. I'm the one on the far right.

Thank you, God, for reaching down and picking me up, once again! I love You with all my heart and soul, Jesus! Thank You for loving me as I am, flaws and all! Thank you for forgiving me when I make mistakes and I still make them everyday! But it is through your sacrifice that I can be forgiven! Thank You, thank You, thank You, thank You!

A Day in the Life

2009-04-16T17:32:00.011-05:00

These are random pictures to represent a day in our lives here at home! They weren't all taken in the same day, but they give you a general idea as to what our household is sort of like!

This is the baby, all kicked back and relaxed in his toy of choice!

This is the same baby with a boo boo on his knee that his Daddy got an ice bag all ready for him to place on his knee!

This is Matthew getting ready to head butt a soccer ball! Ever since the spring season has started, I watch him on the soccer field and think, "Is this my boy?"

This is Isaac just gazing at some deviled eggs that he created all by himself! He loves cooking and helping me out in the kitchen! I think he will make a great husband to his wife one of these days!

This is James laying in my lap at Matthew's second grade program, telling me that he is extremely bored and ready to go!

This is the appearance of our bathtubs (plural as in meaning that both of our bathtubs in our house) are constantly full of toys, hot wheel cars, anything that the boys want to play with in the bathtubs are left in there! Occasionally, a battery operated toy will make it's way into the bathtub and then it no longer works! I can hear my husband every morning, getting ready for work, cleaning all the toys out of the bathtub!

This is my husband in his new found t-shirts flexing his muscle for me! I won't even go there on how I feel about those t-shirts!

This is the boys having a hey day playing a rousing game of twister!This is the state of our guest bathroom toilet after the baby flushed a yo yo down it on Easter morning! It has not been usable ever since Easter and as we speak, it is still off limits to use! My husband is going to have to remove the toilet to remove afore mentioned object! And let me say, this is not the first time that this has happened! James flushed a toothbrush down the toilet in the past and my husband had to remove same said toilet, get his wife to get a pair of tongs and remove the culprit toothbrush! My husband said that it will be this weekend before he can get around to doing it! Alas, we've had to walk the whole distance of the house to go into our master bedroom's bathroom to use the toilet! Every time somebody walks into the guest bathroom, you can hear a moan of exasperation and then they turn around to go into the other bathroom! So, it was a very good idea for my husband to tape up the toilet and place the sign on it!

This is all the boys having a grand old time with some of their friends that came over to spend the night! My husband treated them to a nighttime ride in the back of his pickup truck through the woods!

And that is the end to our day!

Good night, all!

The Beginning And The End

2009-04-13T18:51:00.013-05:00

I know this is my third entry for today, but I'm having to share what happened to us this Easter. This was the view from our front window...a stunningly, spectacular sunrise to God's glorious Easter day.

And this was the end to our day! It had rained all afternoon long, but this was God's ending to our Easter! What a grander way to end the day than to be shown God's promise to the whole world! Please overlook the vehicle parked in the front yard!

Thank you, God, for giving me a sign almost on a daily basis lately that you are ever present in our lives!

Easter Dress

2009-04-13T16:17:00.006-05:00

This is my Easter Dress. I have one friend that personally knows that this was my first Easter Dress that I've ever boughten. But there's a story behind it. Grab a seat and let me tell that story.

My husband had never taken me Easter dress shopping before in our total of 14 years of marriage. He had never felt the gumption to do so before.

He was talking with his bookeeper a couple of weeks ago asking her how her day went. He likes to make small talk that way.

She told him about Easter dress shopping and about how JCPenney was having a phenomenal sale on dresses.

He thought, "Hmmmm, my Mom used to shop for a new dress every Easter."

So he came home that night and asked me since my Mom and Dad would be at our house the following weekend to watch the boys if he could take me Easter dress shopping. I was elated that he wanted to take me shopping. I was also a tad bit nervous because I had never went shopping with my husband. Of course, I said, "Heck yes!"

So Saturday came around. He told me that we would be leaving at 2:00 that afternoon to make a trip to JCPenney. Well 2:00 rolled around, then 3:00, then 4:00. He was outside working on his backhoe (which wouldn't start) with my Dad. When 4:30 came, I thought we weren't going because it was getting close to supper time and I needed to get it started cooking. But at a quarter till 5, he came in all dirty and grungy and asked me if I was ready to go. He got cleaned up, I left supper instructions with my Mom and we took off.

We went to JCPenney. I tried on several different dresses, didn't like any of them...they either made me look frumpy or were too young for me. My husband bought some essentials while we were there, but I had no success.

So, we went to Stage, to K-Mart, to Fashion Bug and to Wal-Mart. But alas, I didn't find one. My husband was sitting in the vehicle waiting on me during these latter shopping sprees. So, I was inside trying on dresses without someone to tell me yay or nay. But I was okay with that, because I'm pretty set on what looks good on me and what does not look good. I'm fairly confident in knowing what I like and what I don't like.

So, we drove home that evening with nary a dress. My husband told my Mom that the city of Rolla was not big enough for me to find a dress that I liked. He also kindly stated that he knew now why we have never gone shopping together...I was too picky!!

Well, Monday rolled around and I had to take my son James to gymnastics in Rolla. While he was there, I was determined to find a dress.

I remembered one that had pink flowers all over it. So, I made the trip to JCPenney once again to try it on. I tried the one with flowers on...didn't like it because it was simply too frilly for me. I found a peach dress that I liked, but I thought it would make me look really short waisted since it had a short jacket with it...that was originally the reason I didn't try it on in the first place. I tried it on and absolutely loved it! So, I bought my first Easter dress ever!

But, here is the real kicker, the very next day, my Mother-in-Love sent me a $100 check specifically to buy an Easter dress. She had no idea what was going on our end of the world, that her son had just taken it upon himself to do something for me that he had never done before in our marriage. She said that the Lord had pressed it on her heart to do that for me.

So, my husband is in awe from this turn of events. He thinks it is the Lord showing us his power and that he is present in our lives. He was working both with his Mom and with him to get me to shop for an Easter dress to bless me. He has shared that story with a lot of his friends and with our pastor, telling them all about the awesomeness of the Lord's will.

I honestly think it was the Lord showing me that he loved little ole' me. It was His way of showing me that he was working with the people around me to bless me and that he was blessing me for what I've been doing for His work lately. Thank you, God, for loving me and blessing me and my family in so many awesome ways!

There you have it, my Easter dress story!

Easter Sunday

2009-04-13T07:11:00.007-05:00

This is the family right before church. My husband shaved off his facial hair. He does that every once in awhile...takes a wild hair and totally shaves it all off. In all honesty, I don't like his face without any facial hair. It makes him look too young. He did that one time in the past when he had a full facial beard and it took me the longest time to get used to it. I kept looking at him sitting in the recliner thinking, "Man, I think that is my husband but he looks so different!"

This is Isaac. He was in conflict this Easter. He wanted to hide them and find them also. He opted for the latter, but I think he's starting to experience some emotions contributed to the fact that he's getting older. I think next Easter he my be hiding them rather than finding them. He may hold onto that little boy a bit longer though, and that doesn't bother me at all.

This is Matthew. He has a ball and a good time doing anything! He's my little merry maker! He went around deer hunting with his Uncle Dave this past November and after it was all over, Dave thanked Randy and I for letting him partake in Matthew's joyous adventure. I guess Matthew kept them in laughter the whole time!

This is James. He's my little rambunctious boy. He's the one that keeps me on my toes in the grocery store, in church, in public in general. But he's a wonderful little boy. He is just full of energy. I'm so glad that the Good Lord has made him that way and he is mine!

This is the baby, John John. He had an absolute ball going around picking up all the eggs, with a little adult help. He is my special gift from God! And I truly believe that God has blessed Randy and I with this gift from heaven above. I believe that God has special plans for this little one. As he does with all his little children!

I just wasn't on my toes this Easter. I totally forgot to bring the boy's Easter baskets, so they had to resort to grocery bags. But they collected eggs just fine with them.

Thank you, Jesus, for your resurrection! For it is only through your sacrifice and resurrection that I am forgiven today for my sins! Thank you, God, for your ultimate sacrifice of your one and only son!

Splitting Gray Hairs?

2009-04-11T15:27:00.007-05:00

According to my sister, my previous profile pic was a little scary. She said that it was right in my face and she didn't like it. So, I had my son take a pic of me this past week. It is now on my sidebar in my profile.

My Mom commented that my old profile picture made me look older than what I actually was. I told her, "Well, I am not getting any younger, Mom!" The gray hairs are going to remain, whether she likes it or not.

My husband actually thinks they look sexy on me. He likes the gray on Emmy Lou Harris and says if I get a head full of gray hair like that he will love it!

So, I am not afraid of turning gray as I get older. I actually like the idea! It gives the person the impression of having wisdom and experienced a few things in life.

The only thing I don't like about it is when somebody mistakes me for my boy's grandmother. And, yes, that's happened three times in the past (yes, I've kept a tally of all the times that has happened). And that makes me feel old, not distinguished nor wise nor sexy nor any of those positive attributes. I had our van in our local tire shop in town to be worked on for something, and one of the mechanics there commented as one of my boys was running around amuck, "You better slow down, young man, you are giving your grandma a run for her money!" If I wasn't offended and a tad bit hurt by that comment, I should have cupped my hand around my ear and said, "Ehhh? Speak up honey, I'm a tad bit deaf in this ear!"

Thanks, Lord, for my gray hairs...they tell everybody that I've been around the block a few times and I've survived another day! Who am I to split hairs?!!

Drama

2009-04-06T14:30:00.002-05:00

No, no drama in our family life. At least not today, anyways!

I went last night to an Easter drama. I was invited by a good friend and I'm so glad that she invited our family to it.

I sat there with James in my lap. I had to keep telling him that they were just actors, that it really wasn't Jesus on the stage. But it did my heart good to sit there and tell him all about the details. I know that he's heard the story so many times before, but it actually brings it home to him that it was something that really happened. It brought His Death and Resurrection to life for all my boys.

I sat there with tears streaming down my face. James even repeatedly asked me, "Mom, are you crying?"

It was very emotional to sit there and watch a drama of our King being beaten and nailed to the cross. As it should be! I can sit and read about it in the bible, but when it is displayed so openly in front of my face, it just brings it all home to me. A person should never, ever grow callus to what Jesus endured for all of us! He suffered and died for me to live!

Thank you, Jesus!

And thanks, Kim, for the invite!

Wildflower Bouquet

2009-04-04T15:58:00.002-05:00

This

first

wildflower

bouquet

the

season,

compliments

little

boys!

Wildflowers

are

precious

jewels

that

they

are

handing

their

mother!

Thank

you,

Lord,

for

blanketing

the

earth

precious

jewels!

My Vision

2009-04-01T10:50:00.006-05:00

This is my world. Without my glasses, it is a blurry, confusing world full of colors that run together. And that picture truly depicts what I see without my glasses. When I look at my children without my glasses, their faces are simply a blurry blob. I cannot even depict which one is who.

I cannot drive without my glasses. If I find that if I have to clean my glasses while driving (due to all the spots that I'm trying to look around), I have to pull off on the shoulder and clean them. I cannot even drive a short distance without my glasses. I cannot simply walk without raising my hands to touch and see what I'm about to trip over.

At my last optomotrist appointment, he told me that my vision is 20/700. That means what a person with near perfect vision can see 700 feet away, I have to be 20 feet away to see the same thing.

I've worn glasses since I've been in the 6th grade. I've been severly nearsighted for 30 years. My Dad claims it was from reading so much when I was younger. If you wanted to find Ronda McCray, just look in a corner. She more than likely would have her nose in a book. But the optomotrist said fooey on that. To keep reading away, it fed my brain!

I've dabbled in contacts. Actually, when I got married, I was wearing contacts. But being young, I simply didn't take care of them the way that I was supposed to (they didn't have disposable back then). So, the optomotrist advised me to stop wearing them because I was getting vessels in my cornea (to this day, I'm not really certain what that mean't). He advised me to have lasiks surgery, but I simply don't like the thought of someone cutting around my eyes with me fully awake. Plus, I want to keep the vision that I've got. Going into something elective like that might actually cause me to go completely blind.

I sleep with my glasses on. I've learned to do that after having 4 babies. Sometime in the middle of the night, they would inevitably cry. I would instantly be alert. But then I would be scrambling to find my glasses. It's no fun having a baby cry and be down on the floor on your hands and knees trying to find your glasses that you've knocked off of the table next to your bed. So, I've adapted. I sleep with them on.

So, if you see me without my glasses, be very wary of what I'm doing! Because more than likely, I can't see you!

Even with my severe vision impairment, I can see 20/20 with my glasses. But the optomotrist has advised me that if it gets any worse, that glasses will no longer be my solution. And let me tell you that for the last 4 years it has leveled out. Every year I would go to have my vision checked and it would be the same result, stronger prescription because it had gotten worse. But for the last 4 years, my prescription has not changed. The Good Lord has answered my prayers. Thank you God!

Here is the same picture adjusted to 20/20 vision.

My Job Resume

2009-03-31T09:25:00.023-05:00

Lawn Mower Assistant
From the age of 10 to 16
Job duties: Helped my Mom & Dad on their lawn mowing duties throughout the summer. This consisted of mowing various lawns throughout town and cemetaries, hand trimming grass around sidewalks, tombstones, flower beds...basically anything that the lawnmower couldn't reach, my Dad had a pair of hand trimmers that I became mighty adept at utilizing. I also became quite adept at handling a riding lawnmower and also whipping around tombstones with a push lawnmower.

Summer High School Secretary
From the Age of 16 to 18
Since I now had my driver's license, I left the duties of lawn mowing to my Mom and Dad and moved onto bigger fish to fry.
Job duties: Helped the principal to make the School handbook for the school year, typical secretarial duties, I remember doing a lot of typing on the old high school typewriter (no computers back then).

Houston Radio Station Secretary
Age 18
I initally applied for this job hoping to get a spot as a radio DJ. But the manager didn't like my voice. He claimed that it was too "nasally". So, he placed me in the job of secretary.
Job duties: A lot more typing, I typed up the weather announcements and the news headlines for the Radio DJ's to be able to read over the air, I typed up the commercials to be read over the air, typical secretarial duties, once again.

Drury University Biology Department Secretary
Age 18 to 22
Once I got into doing the duties of the secretary, I couldn't escape it.
Job duties: typical secretarial duties, a lot of typing, once again. I did a lot of running errands for the department heads in between the departments (i.e. from biology to psychology and from mathematics back to biology).

Houston Swimming Pool Lifeguard
Age 19 to 20
This was by far the coolest job that I had so far. I actually trained to have a job like this while I was still in high school. The opportunity to have this job didn't arise until between my freshman and sophomore year in college. I was rehired between my sophomore and junior year in college.
Job duties: Just watching and watching and watching. I actually had to throw my ring buoy two times. Once when a little girl who could not swim had jumped into the deep end, her brother jumped in after her and she was drowning him in the process of trying to stay afloat. Another time when a little boy had jumped off of the diving board and was not a capable swimmer. I also had to wade in the baby pool to retrieve a toddler that was struggling when a Mom had her attention diverted. I also did a lot of bathroom cleaning and testing of pool water on this job.

Burlington Northern Railroad Environmental Engineering Summer Intern
Age 21
I thought this job would be cool beans. I was one of many interviewees from several surrounding colleges and they picked me. Unfortunately, it was in an inside office without any windows.
Job duties: Looking at old railroad maps and retyping the information into the "newfangled" computer system that they had back then. It is now an outdated computer system, but back then they thought it was THE thing. I also got to go out with the actual environmental engineer when Burlington Northern had a bad chemical spill in a residential neighborhood in Springfield. I did get to do a little field work, but not much. The only really good thing I got out of this job was that it paid really, really good. I got to save some money that summer.

Dickerson Park Zoo Zookeeper
Age 22 to Age 26
This was the one and only job that I interviewed for right when I was graduating from college. There were several interviewees for the job, and I ended up getting the job. I actually studied each animal's diet that they have at the zoo right before the interview so that I would be well informed. I thought it would be right down my alley since I studied biology in college. When I tell people that I was a zookeeper in my past, they think it is probably the coolest job. In all actuality, I absolutely hated this job. It was the first job that I ever had that I absolutely dreaded getting up in the morning and going to work. But I kept doing it for 4 years. I think the thing that I hated the most about it was the fear that I had everyday on the job. Some people thrive on working under those circumstances but it was eating me alive on the inside. I worked side by side with Asian Elephants, with Hippos, with Bald Eagles, with Pythons, with Lions, with Cheetahs, with Alligators, with Ostriches. And it's not just feeding them through a fence, but you have to actually get in with these animals and tend to them. An Asian Elephant, if it had a bad day, could grasp you with it's trunk and throw you against the wall and attempt to crush you by doing a headstand on you. I saw one zookeeper so badly hurt that he lost full use of one of his arms as a result of working with an upset elephant. There was more than once that a zookeeper had to be taken via ambulance to the hospital for dealing with an irate elephant. A Bald Eagle is not a small bird, when having it sit on your hands, it could easily grab hold of your scalp with its claws and rip your face to shreds with it's beak. A Python, wrapped around your body, could easily get to your neck and squeeze away. The Alligators had to be moved every fall inside where it was warm and the way that was done was by getting in with them, catching them, holding their mouths closed and duct taping them closed. You had to go in the pens with the Ostriches and gather their eggs...it's no fun having an Ostrich chase you around the pen when it is fully capable of taking your head off with it's huge feet. I would always have an animal stench about me when I left from work...my first duty when getting off from work was taking a long shower. Can you tell that to this day, I'm not a big animal person? I really am not a fan of animals. I let my boys have their dog and their cat, but absolutely no inside animals!
Job duties: Cleaning a lot of animal feces, feeding the animals, nursing animals back to health, building a lot of new animal exhibits, I got to operate my first chain saw while working here (my Dad never trusted me at home with a chain saw).
I ended up quitting this job when I had absolutely no prospects for another job. I had had enough after 4 years. I gave them my two week notice and walked out the door after my two weeks were up and never looked back.

91 Sierra Preventative Medicine Specialist US Army Reserves
Age 24 to Age 30
After working under such fearful circumstances, I thought the Army could not throw anything at me that I couldn't face. And I was right!
Job duties: A lot of running and doing pushups! I was the top graduate in my class at Fort Sam Houston, Texas, Medical Training Facility. I worked in Preventative Medicine which is basically going into an area and making certain that it is livable for soldiers both in training and in war. We did a lot of water testing, insect identification, disease identification.

Substitute Teacher
Age 26
This was the job that I went to after quitting Dickerson Park Zoo.
Job duties: I think you all know what a substitute teacher does. I much enjoyed substitute teaching the older ages rather than the younger ones. Simply because I could hold a conversation with the high school kids rather than constantly telling the elementary kids to please hold the noise to a minimum. Now that I'm a Mom, I think I could handle the younger kids a little better.

Switchboard Operator and Emergency Room Admissions at Texas County Memorial Hospital
Age 27
Job duties: Answering all the phone calls that came into the hospital, Admitting people to the Emergency Room, doing the paperwork entailed in admitting someone to the Emergency Room.
I had to leave this job because my husband and I had just gotten married and we moved to Nixa.

Wife
Age 27 to present day and beyond
It was with great honor and privilege that I took my husband in holy matrimony. He found me at a time in my life when I needed his love. This job requires a lot of patience and nurturing and reciprocal love. You can read about our love story in my previous blog entry.

Environmental Safety & Health Administration (ESHA) Field Technician
Age 27 to Age 28
Job duties: Going all over southwest Missouri inspecting septic fields and drinkable water. I liked this job, but unfortunately the company went out of business. This was the first job in which I was laid off.

Quality Control for Degraffenreid Pickling Company
Age 28 to Age 30
I liked this job, but I didn't like the hours. I had to get up at 4:30 in the morning and I am not a morning person. This is the only pickling company in Missouri and it is located in Springfield.
Job duties: A lot of math involved in calculating the acidity, the pH, etc., of all the brines. I was the Director of the Quality Control over all of the outside brining tanks. There were close to 1,000 huge brining tanks...and when I say huge, I mean that they had to build scaffolding to the top in order to reach the top of the tanks. It was basically the Quality Control's department to make certain that the product met the specifications of the company before reaching delivery, from the number of defects per pickle to the chemical balance of the brine. It was with this company that I took my first business trip down to Raleigh. They flew me there on a conference when I was pregnant with my first child. The president of the company was a little hesitant to send me because he knew I would be quitting when my due date approached, but he sent me anyways because he knew that I was a good employee and it would be a good learning experience for me. I always smelled like a pickle when leaving from work and whoever would ride in my car with me would comment, "Man, this smells like a pickle." Believe me when I say I liked this smell a whole lot better than that wild animal smell that always surrounded me at the Zoo.
This was the last job that I held until becoming a Mother. I worked at this job until 2 weeks before I was due with my first son. I actually gave them a 1 month notice that I was going to leave and I was so sad! I had made good friends with my fellow Quality Control Technician...at that time, she had 4 children. Little did I know that was my destiny also!

Mother
Age 30 to Age 41 and to my end days
I remember on my 30th birthday, my husband and I were driving to Springfield to eat out in celebration of my birthday. I was driving and the tears just started flowing. My husband exclaimed, "What in the world is wrong?" I sobbed, "I just turned 30 and I don't have any children." My husband and I had been trying for a year and half to conceive, but with no results. And let me tell you, it was 2 months later that I was in our bathroom taking a pregnancy test, expecting it to be negative, like so many previous pregnancy tests that I had taken. Imagine my utter surprise and shock to see that little positive sign start appearing. My husband now claims that after our first pregnancy that it is hard to keep me not pregnant. But I want everybody to know that this is the most precious job that I've held. It has the most absolute joy, heartache, love, frustration and simple adoration of any other job that I've held. It was with great honor that I took the role of Mother assigned to me my the Great Lord above.

Graphic Designer
Age 36 to Age 41
I absolutely love what I'm doing now. I was always artistic when I was young and I absolutely loved drawing. I'm self-taught in all my graphic design software and programs. I would love to be able to go back to school and get an actual Graphic Design degree, maybe when all my children get in school can I focus on going back to school. And that's a big MAYBE!
Job duties: Create on the computer various backgrounds for a paper scrapbooking company, create magazine ads, create rub-ons, create cardstock stickers, create complete digital scrapbooking page kits.

And that is my whole life of employment in a nutshell! It says absolutely nothing about me as a person, but it represents some of the things that I've endured and loved over the years!

Thank you, God, for my life! It is with all honesty and integrity that I can say that now...I couldn't honestly say that when I was 25. But the Lord has guided me and led me to where I am today. Thank you, Lord, for protecting me!

Their Love Story

2009-03-30T12:46:00.014-05:00

He was the tall and lanky, shaggy headed boy in our high school. He had a head full of natural curls. He was always goofing off and a laugh was always lurking behind his smile. He liked to have fun with his friends and pulled off a couple of practical jokes that to this day the high school principal would love to know who was the brains behind it. He was not a straight A student, not even a straight B student, but he loved having fun in life.She was the quiet one in high school. She was the straight A student without having to study at all. Everybody thought she was the teacher's pet. She loved the smell of notebook paper, the lead in pencil, the chalk as it rained dust down on the floors in front of the chalkboard, the smell of newly mopped classroom floors. She absolutely loved going to school. Her hair was long and straight, reached almost to her waist. She didn't have any best friends, but she had a small circle of friends. She was basically the geeky and nerdy girl of her class.

They were in drama and theatre together. They actually performed side by side in some theatrical productions throughout their high school days. He commented later on in life that he would take notice of her when she sat down in the drama classroom (and that is said a lot more tactfully than he actually stated), but that was basically the full extent of their involvement with each other. They passed each other in the hallways with nary a sidelong glance at each other during their whole high school career. They were wrapped up in their own worlds and had no idea about the other one's world.

He had graduated from high school and was attending Missouri State in West Plains while living at home with his Mom & Dad. He was working at the local radio station as a DJ. He loved doing that type of work, albeit he didn't love the hours that it involved. She had just taken on the job of secretary at the radio station. She was still a senior in high school.

He wasn't dating anybody and neither was she. It was actually his boss that stated one day, "Hey, why don't you take Ronda out on a date?" So, he obligingly asked her out on a date. She said yes because she simply did not date much in her high school days and this was a treat.

They went out on 3 dates total. On one date they went to his brother's farm and they ran all around the barn and climbed fences. On another date they went to a movie, went out to eat and parked in his church's parking lot just to talk! ;>) And she has forgotten all about the third date. He claims that she bought him a button down shirt with a sweater vest, but she doesn't remember that at all.

And then he stopped calling her altogether. A friend of hers said, "He stopped calling you because he said that it was too expensive to date you." But it didn't really matter to her because she was just about to graduate high school and a whole new world awaited her, or at least she thought.

They parted ways and each went their own direction in life. Little did they know that for 2 years they lived in the same city while attending college. Springfield, MO would grow near and dear to both of them, but they had no idea about the other one's whereabouts, they were too involved with their own worlds to worry about the other.

Now, let's fast forward through a bunch of life's worries, pains and heartaches to nine years later.

His best friend from high school was always trying to set him up with a girl or two over time. He asked him one day, "If there was a girl that you dated in the past that you would like to meet again, who would it be?"

He stated, "Well, if I had to say that there was one girl that I'm afraid that I let go and shouldn't have, it would have to be Ronda McCray. But I'm almost certain that she is married by now and has a family of her own."

And the conversation was left at that.

Two months later, she was substitute teaching at her old hometown of Houston. She was called in by a kindergarten teacher to subsitute for her for two days while she was out of town.

She substitute taught his best friend's little boy.

His best friend called him up and said, "You will never guess who just substitute taught my boy. It was Ronda McCray. And she's not married because she is using the same last name as she had in high school."

Let me tell you, if God didn't have his hand in the play of events on that one, I don't know who did.

So, he called her up and told a fib about how he would be in Houston deer hunting the following weekend (he had no plans on being in Houston at all) and would she mind going out to eat with him in Mtn. Grove. Of course, she graciously accepted his invitation.

He told her that when she opened the front door and he saw her as a woman rather than the little girl that he remembered, that it rocked his world.

And even though many years had passed since they went out on their dates in high school, the words of her friend still rung in her ears. So, when the evening concluded, she paid for the meal in full without any qualms at all. She had no plans of being too expensive to date again!

On their second date they went to a movie. He was wearing that same button down shirt and sweater vest that she had bought him so many years before.

They dated for 4 months, fell in love, were engaged and were married less than a year after their encounter with each other.

His Mom later told her that his parents were praying that their son would find his soulmate in 1995. They prayed this for 3 or more years.

They met again in 1994 and were married in 1995, not aware that his parents had prayed for this very thing for a long time.

The Dear God above has guided them through their encounter together and through their lives together!

Albeit they have their little squabbles, going to bed angry and the occasional big argument, the Lord is still guiding them through their lives together. Thank you, God, for being central in their lives and holding them together through the thick and the thin!

Askew Equilibrium

2009-03-28T22:23:00.014-05:00

We had the windows cranked down, the warm spring breeze blowing our hair every which a way, and we were bellowing along with the CD that was blaring through our van speakers. Isn't it wonderful to be able to sing along with a song in your vehicle, know every word to the song and not have a care in the world about who hears you singing? That was the picture of my boys and I as we drove the 3 hour trip to my Mother-in-Love's over spring break. We had nothing but blue skies and sunshine for the whole drive.

We did a lot in the little amount of time that we had.

I learned that my middle son, Matthew, does not handle the game of putt putt golf very well. It's his competetive streak in him that forbids anybody around him from enjoying the spoils of winning. Let's just say that he does not handle losing very gracefully. Nuff said about that!

The baby had an absolute blast hitting the golf ball around.

We got to go scuba diving in the sea (via the IMAX theatre). It was almost like being in the water, swimming around the coral reefs off of Australia! My oldest walked out saying, "That was totally amazing!"

We were able to go to church Wednesday evening with the boy's Grandma! She had given each of the boy's a little red copy of the New Testament. John John latched onto that little bible and would not put it down for nobody. He even slept with it clutched in his hand.

On Thursday, we went to Steal Your Dollar City...oops, I mean Silver Dollar City. In all actuality, I love the atmosphere of Silver Dollar City a lot, lot better than Six Flags. There are actually Christian shops at Silver Dollar City where you can browse, whereas at Six Flags, there is no such thing. Also, at Silver Dollar City there is a focus on old time heritage and that is right down my alley...I love antique things.

Matthew is now tall enough to ride all the hair raising roller coasters. He got to ride the Powder Keg and the Wildfire, much to his little boy delight. That is him and his older brother, Isaac, sitting in the very last seat, just about to get blasted off on a very torrential ride.

James got to ride the Fire-In-The-Hole all by himself. He was like a proud banty rooster strutting around after that one! He also got to ride Thunderation with his Mom sitting right beside him...unfortunately, we were riding backwards the whole time.

My oldest talked his very own Mom into riding on the Barn Swing. I realized after that one that I'm simply getting a little too old to ride on those rides. It set my world all akilter. What little sense of equilibrium I had was set all askew. My oldest son got to witness his own Mother screaming her head off like a mad woman. He was doubled over with laughter when it stopped. I'm glad it made his day, but thereafter my stomach was doing flip flops! And yes, two of my boys are on this ride in this picture, you just gotta pick them out.

All in all, it was a great day to be at SDC! The crowd wasn't too thick and the weather was perfect! It didn't start raining on us until we started to leave at 5:30.

Here are a couple of pictures throughout the day of the boys having fun.

We had lunch with my husband's brother on Friday. It's taken me about 14 years to feel comfortable around him, but I can honestly say that we had a great time together, albeit a short time at lunch. He was telling me about a pond that he had specifically built for the boys and that he was in the process of stocking it with catfish. The next time that we get to visit with him at his ranch, the boys can have a hey day pond fishing. He and his wife were blessed with 2 girls that are now gone out of the home and living their own lives. So, I think he is living some of his dreams of having boys through my sons. But that's okay, it gives them a great uncle to look up to.

Our last stop on the tour was at my sister's house on Friday evening. We had fun at a pie auction and silent auction at the Christian Academy that my sister has taught at for the past several years. She actually informed me of a couple of our cousins that were on facebook that I'm now friends with. Small world afterall, huh?

And that, ladies and gentleman, concludes this leg of the tour.

I want to add something else, though.

I stepped up to the plate this spring break. And I'm not talking about baseball. I'm talking about doing your responsibility as a human being. I took my boys to see their aging Grandmother simply because she wanted to see them, she hadn't seen them since Christmas. I did it not for my husband and not for myself...but I did it for my boys and their Grandmother. Somebody's gotta take that step, it might as well be me since I've got the motivation and the Lord leading me.

But let me tell you, it is very, very difficult to leave an almost 80 year old woman standing at her front doorway, crying tears of sorrow for seeing her family leaving her alone once again. Since her husband has passed away, she has been battling loneliness. He passed away 13 years ago. She has sat with me and expressed her great battle with that lonely feeling. So, needless to say, I find it a great honor to take my boys with her and let her home be filled with all that surface noise...at least temporarily.

I'm going to close with a picture of my boys with their lovely Grandma. Thank you, Lord, for giving me a Mother-In-Love that I can feel at ease in her home!

Sidenote

2009-03-21T19:30:00.001-05:00

This is a little sidenote to my previous blog entry.

I went into our bathroom this afternoon. Matthew was in there diligently wiping the tub down.

I asked him, "Whatcha doin'?"

He proudly stated that he was helping me clean the house. He had cleaned out both bathroom sinks, in the process of cleaning out the tubs and next on his agenda was the windows. He was doing all these things without me asking him to do them. There was absolutely no prompting on my part.

He knew he had done something wrong and was attempting to rectify the situation the only way he knew how.

As a Mom, I am so very, very glad that I did not yell at him nor use any harsh words when the fiasco happened. I am so very, very glad that the Lord was there dealing with me and helped me to deal with it the way that I did. It would have crushed his little ego, because he already knew that what happened was not a good thing. It would have been fruitless for me to hammer it in him by yelling at him.

I love you with all my heart and soul, my young Matthew!

By the way, remember the front window with all my smudges and handprints? It is now clean as a whistle! But Matthew will not be hearing from me that I was saving all those handprints on it. There will be many more days in the future when John John will be standing at that window again, adding more handprints. But I now officially have a clean front window, all thanks to the young and noble Mr. Matthew!

Thank you, Lord, for my little Matthew!

ea without the t

2009-03-21T14:37:00.008-05:00

I've gotta share this with somebody, or else I'm gonna wither away into a little ball in the corner.

Remember my project from the other day? My plates displaying the simple, but artful word "eat"?

Matthew was dribbling the basketball in the dining room. Don't ask me why he didn't choose the living room, his bedroom, the basement, the front porch, the homemade basketball court that his Daddy built for the boys...of all those places to choose from, he chooses our dining room as his own little basketball court.

And you guessed it, my "t" that I created went crashing down on the floor and exploded. It didn't just break, but broken glass went all over the dining room and even into my kitchen. It went off like a little bomb.

I was actually sitting at the dining room table working on a project and I simply sat there, stunned. There was total silence in the house for a good full minute after it happened. I honestly could not believe what just happened. Matthew ran off, thinking he was gonna get in big, big trouble.

I sat there in shock, not really knowing what to do...to yell, scream, cry. I simply stood up, went to get the broom and started sweeping it up. That was all I could do.

I was out on our back deck, shaking out one of the rugs that had glass shards all scattered throughout it and my husband was behind the house working on his back hoe. He asked, "Whatcha' doin'?"

I simply told him in the calmest of voices, "I lost my t."

At first, there was a look of confusion on his face. He had absolutely no idea what I was talking about. But then it dawned on him.

And I knew what was coming next.

He replied, "I'm not going to tell you I told you so. But if I was..." And he left it at that.

I went back in the house and slammed the door behind me.

Here is what remains of my "t":

And yes, all the missing pieces of glass are what shattered into little minuscule pieces and scattered everywhere in our dining room and kitchen.

As I sit here, 30 minutes after it happened, I still don't know how to react. I could go into a long spiel about how my son knew better than dribbling the basketball in the house, about how I've lost numerous breakable things over the years to their roughhousing, on and on it could go. But in the end, it all comes down to this one factor: my husband was absolutely right about telling me it was not a safe place to hang those plates. But I honestly thought they would last more than 3 days in the house. I obviously was all wrong in my thinking.

So now we sit at our dining room table, getting ready to ea without the t.

All I can say right now is thank you, Lord, for giving my son the energy and ability to dribble the basketball!

Bonfire

2009-03-20T21:43:00.004-05:00

We really had the fire a cranking at our house tonight! Matthew has been begging his Dad for a campfire for the past week, so tonight was the night to build a big bonfire since it was the official start of spring break. Let me tell you, the sparks were a flyin'! And the marshmallows were a roastin'! Of course, James has no concept of gently toasting his marshmallow, he has to thoroughly burn it and flame broil it before he considers it done. And I must shamefully admit, the marshmallows were a tad bit on the stale side since they were left over from last year's camping season. But the boy's had absolutely no qualms about it...a marshmallow is simply a marshmallow in their eyes. Wow, sitting around the campfire, singing songs (Randy and I are working on "Were You There When They Crucified Our Lord?"...a Johnny and June Carter Cash song) and roasting marshmallows really has put the camping fever in all of us. Our camping season will begin at the end of April when we have it planned to go on an extended camping weekend with my husband's brother at Bennett Spring. We've raised the boys camping every summer and it is something that they look forward to every season. Camping is perfect for our boys, it lets them get the chance to run around like wild indians and be at ease at it since they are in the great outdoors.

This picture was taken a couple of days ago when it was so warm outside. My two oldest boys (husband included in that generalization) just playing a game of horse. I was playing also, but Mom got eliminated first after spelling h·o·r·s·e very quickly in the game. Figures that they would eliminate the girl player first!

So, I went jumping on the trampoline. Matthew got the perfect picture shot of me way up in the air, but I'm embarrased to post it. Let's just say that it's not a real flattering shot. John John had the most absolute best time jumping on the trampoline with his Mom. James and Matthew were running around playing cowboys and indians!

And you know what? It is all a good life! Thank you Lord for giving me the chance to slow down and enjoy my family! You've got to enjoy life as it passes you by or it will fly by and you will end up wondering what happened?

Smudges and Handprints

2009-03-19T09:52:00.006-05:00

Woohoo, my husband finally splurged and placed a new screen door on our front door! No more letting flies in this summer when the boys go in and out and leave the front door standing wide open! They can now stand in the front door and watch for the approaching bus in the morning! It was a high dollar screen door that my husband's company was putting out of stock and he got a very sweet deal on it. But I wonder how long the window will remain clean of fingerprints, smudges and simply handprint goo? Here is a picture of our front window with all it's handprints all over it. I know I can simply wipe it clean, but you know what...I don't wanna! That front window signifies something very important in our family...it is where the baby anxiously awaits the arrival of his big brothers off of the school bus. Awaiting for their arrival so that he can run around the house and play with his cool, awesome brothers. Sometimes I wonder what people think when they enter the house and see smudges and fingerprints all over our front window. As a mother, I absolutely hate removing all those handprints, for they are a sign that the baby has been at that very window, watching, waiting and dreaming. That window has served as a focal dreaming point...a window to daydream about playing with our family dog, to watch the first falling snow of winter, a window to gaze at the tire swing and wonder if Mom is too busy to push him all the way to the sky, a window to wait for his brothers to come home from school, wondering and waiting for the day when his school bus will arrive to pick him up for school. Some houses try to hide the fact that children reside there. Ours boasts of it quite openly, for there are smudges and fingerprints all over the front window! And I'm guessing that it won't take it too long to have those same handprints all over our front screen door!

My Project

2009-03-17T23:38:00.003-05:00

Here is my project that I did this morning. I saw a picture in one of the home decorating magazines sponsored by my husband's work with these identical type of plates openly displayed in the dining room. I absolutely loved the simplicity of it, but also the artful nature of it. So, I created my own. I bought the plates at the thrift store, made the stickers on my computer, stuck them to the plates and displayed the plates in my dining room window. Voila, instant cheap art decor in my dining room. I showed them to my husband and he commented that they were not in a safe place since we would be raising the windows in the summertime. So, now I've got to find a different place for them. But I thought they looked perfect sitting in my dining room windows with the sunshine in the background. I thought about placing scrapbooking glue dots behind them to hold them in place, but my husband didn't like it. Any ideas to help out?

i am strong

2009-03-17T12:52:00.003-05:00

i am a strong mother · i am not a strong woman · i am a strong wife (i attempt to be most of the times, anyways) · i am not a strong sleeper in the night · i am a strong christian · i am not a strong singer · i am a strong believer in Jesus · i am not a strong teacher · i am a strong reader · i am not a strong housecleaner · i am a strong artist · i am not a strong conversationalist · i am a strong listener · i am a strong friend · i am a strong advocate of love · i am a strong praying woman · i am strong enough to carry on from my past · i am strong enough to build a future for my boys · i am strong enough to draw breath for another day · i am strong enough to be brave in the dark for my boys · i am strong enough to stand tall in the face of trouble · i am strong enough to keep love real in our family · i am strong enough to fight for what's right · i am capable of being strong even when i am weak · i am strong enough to set aside, for the time being, those doubting questions that persistently pop into my thoughts · i am strong because Jesus says so!

Thanks to the Lord, my strengths far outweigh my weaknesses!

2 Corinthians 12:9-10 And He has said to me, "My Grace is sufficient for you, for power is perfected in weakness." Therefore I am with weaknesses, with insults, with distresses, with persecutions, with difficulties, for Christ's sake; for when I am weak, then I am strong.

Just By One Point

2009-03-14T19:30:00.004-05:00

I felt like I was in high school again today. I had the butterflies in the stomach, very nervous feeling. It was always during my speech tournaments (I competed in Storytelling, Original Oratory and Dramatic Interpretation) in high school that I felt those very same feelings.

I felt those feelings today while sitting in the bleachers watching my son compete to go to state in wrestling. I felt those same raw, gut wrenching feelings today...you would of thought it was me out there competing rather than my son.

When I was in high school, I went to state my senior year in Storytelling. Well, today, my 7 year old son almost made it to state competition in wrestling. I'm a proud Momma, let me tell you. Also, let me explain how this all came about because as of yesterday, I wasn't planning on taking him to regionals...I had other plans for today.

I let my husband take our son last weekend to district competition. My husband came back, painting the picture to me that the competition was so fierce that our son had absolutely no chance at all of winning anything at regionals. He said that the boys at districts were bred and raised just for wrestling. And he stated that our son wasn't handling losing the rounds very well. I told him that his ego needs to be pumped up by loving words and a good old inspirational speech when that happens. But my husband was telling him to basically dry it up. Something that is not our son's love language. So, I said okay, he won't go. This is the end for the season. Our son was okay with that, so I made other plans for today.

Well, yesterday the wrestling coach called me asking why we weren't letting our son go to regionals since the wrestling club had already paid his entry fee. He explained to me that this was an opportunity for our son that not everybody in the wrestling club got the chance to do. There were other boys who went to districts that didn't make it to regionals that would absolutely love to be in our son's shoes. I'm certain that if we didn't take our son to regionals, there would be talk around town about how the Altis' opted out of taking their son to a competition when there were other boys more than ready to go in his place who couldn't.

So, I had to re-evaluate my initial decision. My husband kept bombarding me, saying "You will be wasting your time tomorrow." He said to end the season on a good note, with a couple of first place medals rather than ending the season with a tournament where he would be more than likely to lose every round. That would end the wrestling season with a whole sour note. Plus, he made a good point, stating that we had made a decision as a family, so why change it now?

But you know what I did? I believed in my son, I believed that he could overcome the odds and I placed it in God's hands.

So, my son and I got up at 4:30 this morning and made the trek to regional competition. I placed the care of our other sons in their Dad's hands. One of my middle sons had a baseball camp to go to this morning. Plus, I missed a woman's function at our church this afternoon.

And you know what? IT WAS NOT A WASTE OF MY TIME! For one thing, I got to spend some precious one on one time with one of my sons, which in our family is a rare opportunity.

And our son started eliminating the competition, one wrestling round at a time. He was winning all of his rounds. He was on fire today! It could have been due to the fact that I started pumping him up this morning the moment he woke up. I have never talked so much in my life in one day's time, but I talked non-ceasingly to our son the whole day. I built up his fragile self esteem and let him know how important he is to us and to his wrestling team.

By mid afternoon, he had won 5 rounds. That was the most that he had ever wrestled in a weekend.

It was down to the next to the last round. Our son was dominating the other wrestler. If he won this last round, he would get to go to state. But then the unthinkable happened...he got hurt. The medic was called out on the floor and evaluated the situation. Our son was crying and hurt. It fueled the other wrestler's strength knowing that he had hurt our son. But our son wanted to continue wrestling, so the medic gave him the okay. And I was so proud...he put all of his heart and soul into it!

The final score in the round was 4 to 3...he lost by one point. My 7 year old son missed going to state just by one point! And that makes me a very proud Momma!

Thank you, Lord, for giving my son the strength to accomplish what he did today! All the glory for his wins are due to You! Thank You for placing your hand on him today!

my loves

2009-03-13T18:25:00.010-05:00

i love Jesus · i love my family · i love that my husband and I have been together for almost 14 years · i love that my two year old son can sing the lyrics to “Jesus Loves Me” · i love chocolate chip cookies right out of the oven · i love watching my sons play sports · i love that my husband is a lumberman · i love strong women · i love men who love strong women · i love the power of “thank you” or “i’m sorry” · i love reciprocal inspiration · i love road trips · i love being able to be an artist full time · i love the intoxicating smell of wet woods after a heavy rain · i love that newborn smell · i love being pregnant · i love that refreshing feel after taking a long, luxurious bath · i love sleeping late and wearing your pj’s for half the day · i love tucking myself in a corner and getting totally lost in a good book · i love walking out of the camper on a cool crisp morning and huddling around a newly built campfire · i love paddling past the last bend on a float trip and knowing that you will soon be setting feet on solid ground · i love sitting down on the toilet in my own house rather than making the long, fearful and cold trek after dark to the outhouse (which i did uncountless times while growing up) · i love taking a pregnancy test and seeing the positive sign show up · i love the smell of frying onions in a house · i love when my boys excel in school · i love learning about the extraordinary women of the bible · i love scrapbooking · i love creating art on the computer · i love taking an exceptional picture that is worth a thousand words · i love hearing my pastor preach · i love drawing · i love coffee · i love baking for other people · i love creating gifts for my friends · i love it when my boys play nice together with nary a word of anger for each other · i love the smell of smoke surrounding our house after we’ve built a fire in our wood stove · i love to hear a whipporwhill in the woods · i love to hear frogs croaking along a pond’s edge · i love learning new things every day · i love nursing my babies · i love eating my mom's chicken and noodles · I love eating my mother-in-love's (our nicknames for in-laws)mexican chicken · i love measuring my boys and realizing that they’ve grown so many inches within the past year · i love watching the wonder and amazement in my baby’s eyes when he sees something new for the first time · i love it when i can properly communicate my feelings into words · i love singing around the house, albeit i sing really flat · i love sitting on the front porch after dark and feeling the warm breeze · i love it when my husband and i can hold hands · i love to be hugged by a friend · i love reading the bible · i love my friends · i love isaac, matthew, james, john and randy · i love to be loved

thank you, Lord, for loving me

Company's Coming

2009-03-13T15:15:00.005-05:00

No matter how sloppy my house might be at any given moment in time, my family and I know how to get it tidied up when we know that company's coming. And though company might say "you have the neatest house," I know deep inside that they say what they say because I haven't let them open my drawers or closets or cabinets. But that's OK because what rests in such places isn't meant for public viewing.

One of the criticisms that others have about cleaning up the house right before company comes is the fact that what we show in the house isn't "real". That what is authentic is actually kept hidden in the drawers and closets...as only the pretty and tidied up parts of our everyday lives are what gets presented to company.

So what if I elect to present my best face, my most elevated cleaning? After all, it is a persona we are presenting of the best of who we are, the best of who we aspire to be.

And so, yes, as of this morning, I was cleaning the house and shoving things in drawers, closets, in the boy's bedrooms and slamming the doors closed, trying to put my best foot forward.

But you know what? Though who I am exists in those drawers and closets, who I am also exists in the bright sunny room that is styled and gussied up for the perfect image to be used for the perfect gathering.

So, it is with open arms that I welcome company through my front door! But please be wary of opening that drawer or cabinet door!!!!!

Thank you, Lord, for giving me a house to get sloppy in with my family and for giving me the energy to get it tidied up for company! Also, thank you for giving me the joy of having company to give me a reason to clean it!

typing the wrong e-mail addy

2009-03-12T07:42:00.002-05:00

Our pastor shared this in a sermon a few weeks back. I had to share it here for a laugh. A lesson can be learned from typing in the wrong e-mail address!

An Alberta couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a particularly icy winter. They planned to stay in the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier. Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel schedules. So, the husband left Calgary and flew to Florida on Thursday, with his wife flying down the following day.

The husband checked into the hotel.

There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an e-mail to his wife. However, he accidentally left out one letter in her e-mail address, and without realizing his error, sent the e-mail to a wrong person!!

Meanwhile, somewhere in Houston, a widow had just returned home from her husband's funeral. He was a minister who was called home to glory following a heart attack.

The widow decided to check her e-mail expecting messages from relatives and friends. After reading the first message, she screamed and fainted. The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor and saw the computer screen, which read:

To: My Loving Wife
Subject: I've Arrived
Date: March 12, 2009

I know you are surprised to hear from me. They have computers
here now and you are allowed to send e-mails to your loved ones.
I've just arrived and have been checked in. I've seen that every-
thing has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking
forward to seeing you then!! Hope your journey is as uneventful
as mine was.

P.S. It sure is hot down here!!!!

Signals That It Is A Summer's Eve

2009-03-10T11:58:00.006-05:00

Croaking and chirping frogs with their harmonoious melody along the pond's edge.

The lull of the whipporwhill's call in the tall trees outside our windows, giving the whole woods a forlorn sound.

Walking through a freshly mown lawn in your barefeet.

Watching the boys slurp down popsicles, leaving nothing but gooey and colorful remains on their chins and shirtfronts.

Blowing daffodils into the wind, making a wish, watching them sail into the air and disappearing on the wind current.

Sitting in the dark on the front porch as a whole family, watching the fireflies as they create a unique display of light flashes in our front yard.

My boys having an extraordinarily fun time trying to catch the lightening bugs and placing them in my canning pint jars.

My boys letting those lightening bugs free in my house.

Frantically trying to recatch those lightening bugs in my house and setting them free in the great, wide outdoors.

Waving at the cars that pass by, giggling, knowing full well that they can't see us as a family sitting in the dark on our front porch.

Opening the windows beside our beds to feel the warm night air moving over our bodies as we sleep.

And that, ladies and gentlemen, is the signal to me that summer is nigh!

Thank you, Lord, for the warm gentle breeze that blows across my face!

I Love Jesus!

2009-03-08T09:59:00.008-05:00

As I sit here, trying to nourish my oldest son back to health with chicken noodle soup, quiet time to sleep, hugs and kisses, and just sitting on the couch holding him in my arms, it gives me the greatest joy to know that God supports me! He is constantly there, giving me the strength to battle my personal attacks by satan.

I was not there when my son first became ill. Due to circumstances, he was away with a close friend of mine. He was going to be gone during the duration of the whole day. And I made a point to have my cell phone with me at all times. As a matter of fact, when I took a shower in the morning, I laid my phone on the sink just so that I could hear it if it rings. I called about lunch time just to make certain that they made it okay to their destination.

But unfortunately, throughout the afternoon, my cell phone ringer had been turned off by one of his brothers because he was playing games on it. And that led to a whole lot of havoc! I kept thinking I haven't heard from them, so they must be doing okay. We had an event to go to that evening, and I just assumed that they knew exactly all the details about it because I hadn't received a phone call asking me any questions about it. My red flags as a mother should have been signaling to me that something wasn't right, but for some reason, they were silent all afternoon long. And I think that has to do with the fact that I fully trust this friend with all 4 boys of mine. So, since he was in her hands, I felt safe.

Needless to say, when I finally realized that they were desperately trying to contact me, satan saw his chance to personally attack me. He was whispering in my ear, "See, you aren't a good mother. You weren't there for your son. You left him in the hands of your friend and you weren't there to help her."

And let me tell you, at first he was hitting me in a spot that is very vulnerable for me. He was making me feel like I had let down not only my son, but also my friend. I was not feeling very good last night about myself as a mother and as a friend.

But God has reached down and pulled me up by my bootstraps and let me know that He Loves Me! He has emphasized to me my strong points and he has pointed out to me all of my good points. So, satan, just back off and step away from my thoughts!

Mistakes can happen! Confusion can happen! It has happened to me in the past and it will happen to me again in the future!

I can honestly say that I AM A GOOD MOTHER! I nourish and guide my boys in the right direction and not only do I love them, but I show them each and every day that I love them! My husband and I are raising our boys right! They are exemplifying the Lord's name in their actions with their own friends.

And I AM A GOOD FRIEND! I honestly try my best to let them know that I can be there for them. I give of my heart to them!

And it was only through God's Love and Support that I was able to battle down this personal attack. And believe me, if something like this had happened in the past, I wouldn't have been so strong, I would have let Satan have his hey day with me. I AM A STRONG WOMAN NOW ONLY THROUGH GOD'S LOVE FOR ME!

Thank you, Lord, for giving me the strength to fight another day! For letting me know that you are always there to provide me with the armor plate to fight down those thoughts that sometimes pervade my thinking! Thank you, God, for loving me!

The Military

2009-03-07T12:33:00.008-06:00

I was asked a very interesting question last night. What did I learn from being in the military and would I recommend it to my boys? It caught me off guard and I couldn't respond with an adequate response. But now that I've had time to reflect on it, I think I can better answer it than a vague, "Um, self-discipline and no I wouldn't recommend it to my boys."

I went into the military looking for adventure in my life. I had just broken up with someone who I had been dating for 3 years, I was ready for marriage, he wasn't. Or should I say, he wasn't ready for marriage with me. And praise the Lord, we didn't get married because he was simply the wrong guy. But I was young, fresh out of college, I was in love and was heartbroken. So, I looked to the Army Reserves for the sense of adventure that they sell on their slogans and commercials. In the end, I didn't find it, but that was what I was looking for when I joined.

At that time, I was young and able bodied enough to take on the physical demands of basic training. It instilled in me a sense of determination, especially with the daily rigors of having a drill sargeant not 1 inch away from your face yelling at you, telling you what a weakling you are, basically telling you that you are lower than the low life of the world. In basic training, they try to bring down your moral and your spirit during the first half of it. They try to squash your individual characteristics. During the second half of it, they try to build a "team" without any individuals, they rebuild you to their standards. They attempt to crush the individual and try to rebuild an organism of "one" without individual likes and dislikes...if that makes sense. They completely separate you from the rest of the world at basic training, you can have no contact or at the least, very minimal contact with the outside world. For those 6 weeks of basic training, you are at their mercy. Fortunately, in today's time and age, they can't lay a hand on you. But they sure do a lot of yelling and invading of your personal space to get it done.

I am glad that I joined the Army Reserves, but I wouldn't do it again. I didn't see any combat (thank the Lord)! I joined towards the end of the Gulf War, thinking that I might be sent overseas. But I never was. By the time my training was done (basic training and AIT training included which took about 8 months time total), my unit was home from the Gulf War.

What did I learn from the military? That I could be a tough broad! That I could stand up to the physical and spiritual degrading offered during basic training. They couldn't shell out to me anything worse than what I already judged in myself. I am my own toughest critic. I am my own hardest judge on myself. They couldn't judge me any worse than how I judged myself.

Also, they instill in you a sense of self-discipline with the daily inspections, not just of your uniform, but also the polishing of your boots, your locker, the way your bunk is made, every menial thing in the military is inspected on a daily basis. And if it's not up to par, then you pay retribution with physical labor. And let me tell you, I was the most physically fit I had ever been in my life and will ever be again in my life. I was running 7 miles a day and I could bicycle 100 miles in a day.

But unfortunately, they were trying to shut out my individual characterisitcs. And that's what you have to do in combat, shut out your emotions so when your buddy is killed, you can go onward without shutting down yourself.

And that is why I wouldn't recommend it to my boys. Not simply for the fact that you are constantly under the influence and mercy of someone else (there will always be someone in the military who is higher ranked than you are...and some of them are natural born, good leaders, but then there are some who should not be in the military at all), but also for the fact that they try to shut you down as an individual with individual emotions. You are trained to be a part of a killing team...and that is it in a nutshell. I don't want my boys to be trained to kill. I want them to be free to express their individual personalities to the fullest extent. To let their full potential flourish under God's Love and Nourishment!

But also in the same breath, that's not to say that if one of my boys came home and said, "I just joined the military," that I wouldn't support them. I would support them in every way that I could. It is an honor to be a part of the force that protects the United States. There is absolutely no shame in it whatsoever. Any soldier should raise his/her shoulders high and take pride in what they do or have done. But if I had my druthers (is that such a word?), since I've been in it and actually know it from first hand experience, I would encourage them to go a separate direction and nourish their individual personalities.

Thank you, Lord, for the opportunity to be in the military, it helped me to develop a sense of self-discipline! But it wasn't the military that instilled in me a sense of self-respect, it was Your Love for me that accomplished that!

My Wonderful Son

2009-03-03T10:06:00.006-06:00

Here is the journaling on the layout: "This little cowpoke looks like he's gotten into one too many war hoops with the boo boo on his forehead and the boo boo on the corner of his eye. With the way his mouth is set, it looks like he ought to have "ornery" branded across his forehead."

I've got to spend a little time talking about one of my sons.

And why right now? Because I've just spent some time driving him to school at 9:30 in the morning. He got up this morning, complaining that he had a stomach ache. I took his temperature and it was 99.0. So, he either had a low grade fever (very miniscule) or else it was just from sleeping under a bunch of blankets last night. But I believed him and kept him home from school because this past weekend I had a weak stomach. But when 8:00 rolled around and he was romping all over the house, I knew that he was well enough to go to school.

He is the definite wild card in our family. He is the one that I have to peel off of the walls every night right before bed. I can honestly say that he has an ornery streak in him that is a mile wide.

He is the only child that I've had to go to school to pick him up due to an injury incurred on the playground. And that happened during a summer school before he had actually started kindergarten.

He is the one that comes up with some of the most ingenious things to do to his brothers. And I gotta say that sometimes the ideas that he comes up with are very creative, but they can be very irritating to his brothers.

Some of the things that goes on in that little brain of his sometimes absolutely astounds me. The words that sometimes slip off of his tongue would make a sailor blush. And I'll reply, "Where did you hear a word like that?" His retort, "From school." And I've got to teach him that that word or saying is just all wrong. And I'm sticking to my guns that all bathroom talk should remain in the bathroom or that we just simply don't talk like that. Albeit I'm having to repeat and repeat and repeat and repeat myself on that one with every new "not nice" word that slips into James' vocabulary.

He is a very hyperactive child. My husband commented that while coaching football, there was a child on the team that reminded him a little bit of James. Except the child on the football team was turned up a notch or two above James in the hyperactive department.

But my husband made a comment to me that has really stuck in my mind. He stated, "The difference between the two is that James comes from a family that has God in it. James is gonna be okay because we are teaching him right."

So, that makes me feel okay. It soothes me when I've got to constantly yell at him when crossing a road to wait for us, to not to touch things in the supermarket, to not to do "THAT" to his brothers. He definitely keeps me on my toes.

When he was in the hospital 2 years ago and I got to come home while my Mom stayed at the hospital one night so that I could regroup myself, it was so quiet around the house. James' presence in the house was gone during that time and I didn't like it.

He adds to the noise and he is a very important part of our lives.

He is either going to be an avid sports player or a really big troublemaker in school. He has strength beyond comprehension for a boy of his age. He climbs absolutely everything. I can be in a store paying for something, turn my attention away for just a little bit and he has climbed on top of the counter. He climbs the walls in our hallway, he shimmy's up our door frames and hangs off of the top of the door. Hopefully, my husband and I can channel his energy's into sports and steer him away from trouble. We are hoping to focus his energy's into positive things. That is our prayer, anyways, just to keep him out of trouble and with Jesus in his heart.

He is the one that has a vision impairment. More often than not, he won't wear his glasses and trying to get him to wear his eyepatch is like trying to pull teeth. But he is also proof that God still has a hand in our lives and can heal in answer to prayers! When he was first diagnosed with severe myopia (is that the correct term for lazy eye?), the optomotrist told us that he could eventually go blind in that eye if not taken care of immediately. So, as a praying family, we started praying and haven't stopped. After his last eye appointment, his vision has so drastically improved, that the opthalmalogist told us that he may not have to wear glasses for the rest of his life, much to James' satisfaction. He only has to wear his eyepatch for the next couple of months rather than for the next few years, as was originally diagnosed. And with his vision improvement, his behavior and work in school has greatly improved. As a matter of fact, I got a call from his kindergarten teacher last night saying that she has seen a complete turnaround of James' work and behavior at school that he is being moved from the bottom level group in his class to the top level group. I actually was getting concerned that maybe my husband and I should have waited another year before sending James to kindergarten because he was struggling with the work. His improvement can only be due to the Lord and his hand guiding little James. Praise the Lord!

Thank you, God, for my James! He is a wildflower, but with careful pruning and maintenance, hopefully he will bloom into a beautiful flower full of God's love and grace!

The Power of Good Conversation

2009-03-03T08:19:00.002-06:00

In our household, there is a LOT of surface noise. And what I mean by that is that there is a lot of squabbling between the boys over toys, over who's touching who too much, over who's looking at who in the wrong manner, over who can't keep his hands nor his feet to himself, over the fact that some of them find it impossible to keep his tongue inside his mouth, the most simplest of things. You name it, and there's more than likely "noise" or "commotion" in our house every minute of the day.

And with that, my husband and I find it very, very difficult to have an adult conversation. We find ourselves mediating a lot between the boys. My husband will start to tell me about his day at work, and lo and behold, there's a whining "Mooooommmmmy" or a wail from the other side of the house. My husband will say, "I'll tell you about it later." And later more often than not does not come.

So, last night, after we got all the boys tucked into bed, we just sat in the living room and talked for 3 hours. I didn't mind that it was past my bedtime and he didn't mind that it was past his bedtime, also. We were up until midnight last night. We were doing a lot of reminiscing, sharing of our feelings over the past basketball season, sharing of high school stories. We did go to high school together, but we lost track of each other for 9 years afterwards, and the Good Lord guided our paths together again. That's a story for another blog entry. I've found out over the years that my husband was a tad bit ornery in school. He liked to have a good laugh, as he still does to this day. We were basically having an adult conversation without any interruptions at all. And that, my friends, is good for the soul.

Thank you, dear God, for my husband. He is my rock and solid ground. Albeit there are times when my frustration and exasperation with him reaches it's peak, I love him dearly! Thank you for letting us share our lives together!

It's Over, It's Over!

2009-03-02T08:09:00.003-06:00

Whew, praise the Good Lord, it's all over for the season!

I swear, we have NEVER, as a family, been that intense over a sport ever since being incorporated as a family (lol). Even when my husband was coaching football, it did not seem as time consuming as this basketball thingy. It seemed that basketball took away all of our family time. It even took away some of our church time. We've eaten so many meals on the run, just having sandwiches for supper, frozen pizza...my husband has had to dip in the cabinets and make his own tuna sandwich from time to time.

My husband was chanting all the way home from our final tournament this weekend, "I'm glad it's over, I'm glad it's over." As his wife, the recipient of hearing all about the woes during the basketball season, I am VERY glad it's over.

But my husband and I have learned a lot during our very first encounter with basketball, as has our oldest son. We've all grown as a family and know that we can stick together when the going gets a little rough. We will try it again next year, but we just need some rest from all the going, going, going, going!

As a matter of fact, my husband was so exhausted from all the going that he opted out of going with me to watch a community choir. And music is something that is dear to my husband's heart. So, when he decided not to go, I knew that he was extremely tired. When I told him that we were invited to go, his first comment was, "You gotta be kidding me!" I said, "Nope, but if you aren't going, then I'm going." I felt the Holy Spirit moving in me this morning at Church, and I felt the need to go. The last thing that should be put on the back burner is the Lord. He should be first and foremost in our lives. So, if I feel the need to do something in His Name, by golly I'm gonna go with it.

Thank you, Lord, for giving me healthy and active boys that can participate in these sporting events!

Another THING Bites the Floor!

2009-03-02T07:17:00.003-06:00

Another one bites the dust
Another one bites the dust
And another one gone,
and another one gone

Those lyrics to that song is what comes to my mind when another breakable THING hits the floor in my house.

This time it was a big candle sitting in my front hallway. One of my middle sons came rampaging through the hallway last night, right after coming through the front door. I was down in the garage in our basement and heard it hit the floor with all the shattering details as tiny bits of glass rained down all over my hallway. My husband walked in shortly with the baby and exclaimed, "What happened here? You guys just walked in the door. How could something this drastic happen in such a short amount of time?" That's all it takes, Dad, is just a second for havoc to be wreaked in my household.

But while on my hands and knees, trying to clean up all the glass shards so that they won't inevitably find their way into somebody's foot, I kept telling myself that it was just a THING. It was just a THING that hit the floor and I lost tonight. It has absolutely no significance in our lives whatsoever. I can go out and buy another one, if I must have it in my life. And that was what kept me from yelling at the boys to stop breaking all my THINGS. If you notice when you walk into my house, I don't have a whole lot of breakable stuff in my house. They have either been all broken, or I've opted not to display anything of value.

But I'm working on trying not to yell at my boys over insignificant stuff like that. I have to remember in the grand scheme of life, that the Lord has better things in mind for us as a family than to worry over a candle that just saw it's last flickering flame last week. Or an antique vase that my Mother-In-Law gave me. Or the really big dents that are in the corners of our doorways from heads being slammed in them while the boys are wrestling. My house may openly display all the signs that 5 boys (husband included) live within it's walls, but it's our house. And the good Lord has blessed us with it, scratches on the floor and dents in the wall and peeling paint all included!

Thank you, Lord, for giving me a family that is healthy and active enough to break all my things! I wouldn't have it any other way!

Thank God for Mothers!

2009-02-28T19:58:00.005-06:00

I love my Mother! It's as simple as that! She means the world to me!

She came up this weekend to watch the boys for me and she has done so much more!

First of all, I've been feeling a tad under the weather lately. I chilled last night, feeling nauseated every time I eat, just basically feeling blah, not my normal self! But my Mom, bless her soul, has made me feel so much like I was home again, growing up! She has nurtured me, given me the womanly touch that I sometimes long for! Being surrounded by 4 growing boys and my husband, I sometimes need the nurturing touch of a woman that understands me and where I stand on things! My husband just doesn't really understand that sometimes I need some time off just to lay down and rest my weary head. When he comes home from work sick, he can have the luxury of going into our bedroom, closing the door, shutting out the world and going to sleep. When I'm sick, I still have four boys to take care of. I don't think I've officially taken a day off whenever I'm sick. Of course, I've never asked my husband to take off from work when I'm sick so that I can go in our bedroom and shut out the world. All I can say is thank God for my Mother this weekend! This weekend I really needed her! Not only did she catch me up on my laundry today (which I was behind on, like I normally am), but she had supper ready for the family by the time that my husband, oldest son and I got home from the basketball tournament. And yes, I went to the basketball tournament feeling nauseated! Sometimes a Mom just has to do what she does best, being supportive of her children, through illness and nausea.

My Mom is an angel in disguise! She has always been there for me, supporting me just like I do with my children! She has been there during my weakest and darkest hours, dragged me up from the mud, dusted me off and continued to love me! She simply loves me unconditionally, no strings attached whatsover! I simply don't know what I would do without her! I just wished she lived closer so that I could talk to her on a daily basis.

This is my Mom & Dad's Wedding picture:

This is them a year ago:

Thank you, Lord, for giving me my Mother! As a matter of fact, thank you, Lord, for all the loving Mothers out there in the world!

Forgiveness

2009-02-25T10:19:00.002-06:00

I know the Bible teaches about forgiveness. I know it's a Christian fundamental. But until you've actually done it, you don't know what a relief it is to truly do it.

For the past couple of days, I've harbored hurt, humiliation and a touch of resentment. I've had a stress headache ever since this past Sunday. But this morning I finally forgave and am forgetting, and I feel so much relief it's not even funny. Nope, I take that back, I feel like laughing until the sun goes down. It is a wonderful feeling! You oughta try it sometime!

Thank you, Lord, for teaching us about forgiveness! And thank you for giving me the opportunity to forgive, for if I had left this earth anytime from Sunday to today, I wouldn't have experienced this joy that I'm feeling right now and probably wouldn't be sitting in heaven!

My Lesson

2009-02-24T15:09:00.002-06:00

I couldn't force myself to sit there and watch it. I had to get up and leave with only 57 seconds left.

But you know what, my 10 year old son has taught me to be a better Christian. To have forgiveness in my heart. And just to be happy with what you've got.

He went in with a happy heart and was pulled out with a happy heart. I need to learn from him don't I? My husband and I must be doing something right.

And that's all I have to say about that. I just need time to get over my hurt and humiliation.

I love you, Randy! Thank you for being my anchor and my ground in a world that throws hurricanes at you! You don't know how much I appreciate you and what you represent in my world!

The Culprit Pen

2009-02-21T21:17:00.005-06:00

There it is, in all it's glory.

It wreaked havoc on my family, leaving it's ink all over the crime scene. It left it's trail of ink, only for me to wail out, "Why again?"

Let me ask all the Mom's out there...How many of you have found an ink pen in your dryer? Only to realize after finding it that it left it's trail of ink all on the inside of your dryer and all over the clothes in the dryer?

Yes, this is the ink pen that recently did it's dastardly deed. And I will be the first one to admit that there has been more than one ink pen that has made it's way into my laundry...just look at the inside of my dryer, it's getting a fairly thick coating of ink to prove that.

This go around, it ruined a bunch of my husband's work t-shirts, a good basketball sweatshirt that he wears while coaching, our son's gymnastic's shirt (which I tried bleaching to get out the ink stains, all to no avail). It basically blotched up a whole load of good clothes that will now have to be turned into everyday clothes.

And I will be the first one to tell you that I do way too much laundry to sort through all the pockets in the clothes looking for a culprit ink pen.

So, alas, our family has gained a whole load of "work" and "play at home" clothes.

But I must say, thank you, Lord, for giving me the ability to do laundry, the hands to sort through and fold a bunch of clothes, and hang them all in the closet! And thank you, Lord, for giving me the energy to do it over and over and over and over again!

My Kitchen Art

2009-02-18T14:25:00.005-06:00

The focal point of a kitchen is the fridge. It is the biggest appliance in the kitchen.

My oldest can constantly be seen hanging his head in it trying to find more food...my baby has been known to climb the shelves in it trying to reach the juice on the top shelf.

So, I have a question to ask you...how does the front of your fridge look? Is it nice and neat, with nary anything on it...or is it like mine, with lots of magnets to hold lots of papers on it?

This is a picture of my fridge:

It is actually more than my fridge to hold my food. It is also my artwork hanger (of all my boy's artwork that they draw for me), the boy's lunch menu from school holder, the boy's sports schedule holder, the boy's homework assignment holder, the boy's newsletter holder, my vacation tourist magnet holder, the top of my fridge holds our cereal boxes, it holds our calendar with almost something written in every day to do, it holds our church newsletter, and it also holds the occasional magnetic toy that the boys will hang from it.

The front of it would normally be more organized than what you see because I am in all actuality a very organized person. But, the baby sometimes has a hey day pulling all the papers off it that he can reach and I finally got tired of putting it all back in an organized fashion. But it does hold all of my things that I need to know are upcoming within the next month.

My fridge is actually my daily organizer and my artwork for my kitchen.

Your Smile

2009-02-02T14:12:00.003-06:00

The world bases a lot of its assumption of a person in the way that they smile at you. It is in that first smile or encounter that the person assumes whether you are a congenial person or if you are "snooty". It all depends on how one person smiles or not that a lot of assumptions are built on that first encounter.

Let me give you a little history of my smile.

I was raised in a poor family. We had no hot water in the house nor a toilet in the house at all when I was growing up. But it wasn't because my parents didn't work hard, they are the hardest working people that I know. My Dad calls himself a handyman...he mows yards, trims trees, cleans out fence rows, helps build fences, paints. My Mom cleans houses. According to the people in my hometown, my Mom and Dad are very honest and hard working. They both work at jobs that don't pay a lot, or should I say, they don't charge a lot for their services. But anyhow, my sister and I didn't have a whole lot when we were growing up. But one thing we had an abundance of was family love. My Mom and Dad love us very much and that made up for all that we were lacking monetarily.

Being from a family that didn't have a lot of money, that mean't that they could not spend anything on "extravagances".

And the Good Lord saw to it that I was born with crooked teeth. Being in my family, they didn't have the money for me to have braces. I would have loved to have braces so that my teeth would be straight and I would never have to be ashamed of my smile. But it didn't work out that way. Instead, growing up, I learned to hide my smile and I learned not to smile that much. Because, simply put, I was ashamed of my smile.

Being ashamed of my smile, I had a lot of self-esteem problems. I learned not to like myself a whole lot. Let's say I had a lot of "issues" in my younger years.

Shortly after my husband and I were married, I stated to him if there was anything that I would change about myself it would be to have my teeth straightened. And you know what, he said that he loved me for me and my teeth had nothing to do with it. That was the first time that I realized that my smile wasn't as important as I had thought it was all through these years.

And now having 4 boys of my own, they love me for who I am. Of course there has been the occasional question about why my teeth are crooked and I tell them it was God's plan for me to have crooked teeth. And in the end, I really think it was all part of God's plan for me, because it has made me a humble person.

And so at this phase in my life, I can honestly say, "Thank you, Lord, for my crooked teeth and my smile, it has helped to mold me into the humble person that I am."

Thanks, Lord, for my smile!

Perpetual Chores

2009-01-30T20:44:00.003-06:00

As a Mom of 4 boys, my perpetual chores are doing laundry, picking up dirty clothes, picking up toys before I'm liable to walk on them in the middle of the night, doing dishes and constantly disinfecting around the toilet.

Laundry...when we go somewhere for the weekend, I get way behind on laundry. Since I do on a continual basis 3 loads of laundry a day, if we are gone for a 2 day weekend, I'm behind 6 loads of laundry when we get back. It literally takes me days to catch back up on laundry. It's not too often in my household when all my clothes hampers are empty. And if they are empty, it's only for an hour or two before the boys get off from school and they are once again full of clothes.

Picking up dirty clothes...why is it that their clothes lay where they've taken them off? I'm in the process of teaching them to pick up after themselves...that lesson is still being taught...we are in the middle of it still yet!

Picking up toys...did you know that I fell both times over stuff laying in the floors? The first time I was walking to our bedroom with Isaac as a baby in my arms, tripped over something in the floor, tried to save him in my fall and I broke my ribs. The second time I was walking to turn off the living room light with James as a baby in my arms, tripped over something in the floor, tried to save him in my fall and I broke my collar bone. So, I'm adamant about them picking up their toys before the lights go off. More often than not, the floors are clean of debris now when the lights go out.

Doing dishes...Since my automatic dishwasher doesn't adequately do it's job, I've resorted to handwashing my dishes. Why wash them twice (once in washing all the food off and then placing them in the dishwasher)? Simply by handwashing them, I've eliminated the extra step of placing them in the dishwasher. We are working on a schedule where each boy is responsible for doing the dishes one night a week. For the rest of the week, I'm responsible for doing them. You know, it's funny, since starting this schedule, I've noticed a lot of "somewhat" dirty dishes being placed in the cabinets.

Disinfecting around the toilets...what else can be said except that the boys really need to work on their aim (especially if they wake up in the middle of the night and have to use the restroom)?!!!

But you know what, despite these perpetual chores, I wouldn't change my life for anything. I absolutely love my boys and the "chores" that they bring into my life! I absolutely love the bear hugs and the kisses that they bestow on my cheeks and the little notes that I find on top of my nightstand that states "I love you Mommy". Or the note left by my husband right next to it that says, "I love Mommy more".

There will be a day when I miss all these chores and the daily noise! May that day be long in coming!

Thank you, Lord, for my family! They have brought me so much joy!

Gotta love comfort food!

2009-01-28T14:19:00.004-06:00

There is nothing that goes better together than a snow filled day and hot chocolate! Or how about sitting down at the table with your four boys and snacking on homemade chocolate chip cookies and milk (or in my case, a steaming hot cup of joe)! Mmmmmm!

Thank you God for giving us the opportunity to divulge in a little bit of chocolate!

Old Picture

2009-01-27T21:24:00.003-06:00

I just want to post an older picture that I ran across this evening while trying to catch up on my scrapbooking. I absolutely love it, the way the light is shining all around the baby as he pulls himself up on the cabinet. It's about 2 years old. Just wanted to share it.

Perserverance

2009-01-27T14:21:00.005-06:00

Perserverance: (as defined in the Webster's Ninth New Collegiate Dictionary) to persist in an undertaking in spite of counter influences, opposition or discouragement

That describes my two middle sons to a T. My younger middle son lost all of his wrestling brackets in his first ever wrestling tournament. But, in his second wrestling tournament, he pulled it completely around and won all of his brackets and won first place. If he had stopped wrestling at tournaments (just like his oldest brother did last year during wrestling) due to his tremendous loss, he would have never felt the victory of perserverance. And my older middle son has lost numerous wrestling brackets at these tournaments (too many to count). At first, when he lost, he was absolutely devastated and took it as a personal attack against him. He just wrestled at two tournaments last year (due to Mom & Dad's dislike of these crowded tournaments). But this year, Mom has taken it upon herself to get them exposed to more tournaments (despite her dislike to the whole atmosphere). At the first of the season, he was once again losing a lot of rounds. But I could see growth in his handling of the disappointment posed by losing to another boy (he just shed some tears and pulled himself up by the shoelaces and tackled the next round). And by golly, his perserverance has paid off, also. He brought home a first place medal the other day. Way to go, boys! I'm certain that there will be a LOT more losses in the future for you guys, but you've proved to yourselves that it can be done with a little PERSERVANCE!

Thank you, God, for my family and my boys! They bring so much joy (and noise and mud and dirt) into my life!

Rough and Tough Weekend!

2009-01-26T20:27:00.004-06:00

It was a rough and wild weekend, needless to say!

It started on Saturday morning, heading toward a city an hour away for a wrestling tournament. I had two boys in tow, getting ready to wrestle. We went to town to gas up the vehicle and my youngest boy said, "Mommy, I don't feel good at all!" So, I had to detour 10 miles out of my way to take him back home to my Mom who was watching the baby for me. So, we were about 30 minutes later getting to the tournament than I had originally planned...and I don't like doing that...I'm the type of person that I always like to be either early or very punctual when arriving at an event.

I also left my baby in a sad shape with my Mom. He was running a temperature and had a bad earache. So, I knew he had an ear infection. Unfortunately, we called our pediatrician and our family doctor, but they were both completely booked up with appointments on Friday and Saturday. So, I knew he had to be taken to the doctor after hours on Saturday, but unfortunately I had this wrestling tournament and my husband had a basketball tournament. So, it was a matter of whoever got back first from their sporting event to take the baby to the doctor because my Mom is not really familiar with our town to take the baby to the doctor's office.

So, anywho, back to the wrestling tournament. I go to look at the posted brackets and lo and behold, my son is posted to wrestle with one of his good friends in the very first round. I felt in a real quandry about it. I approached the coach about it, I approached my son about it and then I approached my son's friend's Mom about it. They all assured me that it would be okay. But let me tell you, sitting in the bleachers watching that round of wrestling...it was really, really tough to watch. When it was all over, I was in tears. I only pray to God that doesn't have to happen again...I hate to see my son paired up to wrestle against his good friend...I only hope that it doesn't put a strain on their relationship. My husband claims that it makes men out of our boys...but it puts a real strain on my heart to watch all this heartache and tears being shed by little boys.

We had to wait a very long time for the medals to be awarded and it was very crowded and noisy in the gym. By the time we got out to our vehicle, I saw that my husband had tried to call me three times. So, I called him in a kind of panic thinking that something had happened to the baby or my other two boys. But, he was calling me to get my opinion about the baby since he was no longer running a fever and was playing without complaining about his ear. Fortunately, he took the advice of my Mom and went ahead and took the baby to the doctor because he did find out that he had a double ear infection. So, he is now on a round of antibiotics.

We went to the sports shop to shop for new wrestling shoes (the kind that has velcro closures...making it a lot easier for Mom). It was also the first time that I went shopping for a "cup" for my sons. When my son was wrestling in the tournament, he encountered one wrestler who resorted to the tactics of grabbing hold of his manlihood and pinching really hard. So, I finally gave in and shopped for a cup for all 3 of my sons who are playing in sports. I felt a little embarrassed asking the sales rep in the sports shop to help me shop for the right sizes for my sons. But he had no qualms about it and made me feel at ease. So, all 3 of my school age boys are now official owners of a "cup".

As a family of boys involved in sports, we are quickly learning that in team sports, there are a lot of "politics" involved. When I encouraged our boys to get involved in sports, my husband was hesitant to let them get involved in sports. He knew from experience in playing sports during his school years that the "politics" can get nasty. I knew nothing of it since I wasn't really involved in sports during my school years...I focused more on academics. My husband wanted all of our boys to focus on academics. I persuaded him that if they can find a happy balance between the two, then they have our blessings to get involved in sports. But if their grades started slipping because of sporting activities, then I would pull them in a heartbeat out of sports. Fortunately, our two oldest are doing excellent in school. So, we are trying to distance ourselves from it. In all honesty, I will be very, very glad when the basketball season is over. The only reason I've encouraged my husband to keep at it is because we have watched our older son really grow in the sport. When he first started the season, he couldn't dribble the ball worth a hoot nor throw any decent shots at the basket. He has grown so much in the sport and he's had a lot of fun doing it also...so, we have kept encouraging him to keep practicing. He's not a starter, not even on the second string...he's actually the last man on the floor at all the games. But you know what, it doesn't bother him one iota. He's just thankful for the opportunity to play and practice with his friends. And that makes me happy!

Well, now I've just about talked you an ear full! It's time to get all the boys in bed and time for me to curl up on the recliner upstairs and watch the Duggar family. The boys don't have school tomorrow due to the icky weather!

Thank you, Lord, for the many blessings you have bestowed upon me and my family and our friends! May you bless all who are reading this blog!

Well, hello!

2009-01-20T14:57:00.002-06:00

Yes, I'm rising from the pits of obscurity!

Needless to say, there has been a lot that has happened in my life since I've last written anything (over two years ago)!

Let's see...I've lost 60 pounds, I'm always talking with the Lord trying to constantly renew my relationship with Christ, we are becoming quite homey and getting involved in our church, my oldest is really getting involved in sports, my three school age boys are excellent students, my two middle sons are getting involved with wrestling (much to my shagrin), my youngest is no longer a baby (he is now 2 1/2 years old).

Lots and lots of stuff going on!

But right now, I gotta go. The boys will be home from school in about an hour, I need to get supper going and get their sports practice clothes set out for them.

Talk at ya later!

I've been up to something and a little freebie!

2007-04-10T14:33:00.000-05:00

Yes, I've been busy with baby John, but I also have been diligently working on something else that I can now reveal. I can finally reveal what I've been up to for the last 2 months...I've got a paper product line going to be released towards the end of April. I have officially joined the ranks of paper designers now! Here is the weblink for a sneak peak of what is available through Scrappin' Sports & More: http://www.scrappinsports.biz/ronniepapers.html . I worked with a couple of really cool people behind the scenes to get this product line released...Lois and Bryan...thank you both for the wonderful opportunity! Thanks to everybody for their support!

Well, here's a little picture of John, enjoying a sucker for the very first time:

I'm so behind on my scrapping and downloading pics off of my camera it's not even funny. I had to buy a new camera because my old one went kaplewy on me. I bought a Canon Powershot A640 (10 Megapixels) with a 2 GB memory card. The memory card holds over 400 pictures (even at the highest resolution) and it's just about filled up, plus my old camera still has over 400 pictures to download off of it also. Plus, I'm still scrapping John's first month pictures and he is now 8 months old. So, I officially consider myself behind in my scrapping world right now. But I will plug away at it, until I'm caught up again.

I just released a new Sportin' Along series at scrapbook-bytes. I started with scoreboards at this time because none of my older kits had them. I created a whole collection of them (including Baseball, Basketball, Football, Hockey, Lacrosse, Soccer, Tennis, Volleyball & Wrestling), plus I'm selling them individually. I'm also selling the scoreboard alpha separately, if you want to customize your blank scoreboard. Here is the collection preview image:

Here is the weblink for the scoreboard collection: http://scrapbookbytes.com/store/digital-scrapbooking-supplies/RMCCRAY_Scoreboards.html

Here is the preview image for the scoreboard Alpha:

Here is the weblink for the Scoreboard Alpha: http://scrapbookbytes.com/store/digital-scrapbooking-supplies/RMCCRAY_ScoreboardAlpha.html

And here is the preview image for a Leather Letterman/Varsity Alphabet:

Here is the weblink for the Leather Letterman Alphabet: http://scrapbookbytes.com/store/digital-scrapbooking-supplies/RMCCRAY_LeatherLetterman.html

And finally, here's a little, itty, bitty word art freebie using some of my latest stuff. I created it for little boys (since that's all there is at our house). You can circle one of the numbers to indicate how many points were scored by your little man, as shown in the following preview:

The Word Art is without the red circle, that's on there to show you an option that you can have. Here's the weblink to the freebie (available for two days only, until 4/12/07): http://www.4shared.com/file/13836058/518c4360/RonnieMcCray_SportinAlongWordArt.html

Enjoy and have a marvelous day!

Smiles,
Ronnie

'Nother Freebie!

2007-02-14T14:15:00.000-06:00

Yes, folks, this makes the third freebie in a week that I've posted! I'm on a roll now and there's no stopping me! I've caught the designing bug again! Woohoo! Here is the preview image for it:

I don't know why the background is black (I made it white on the preview image), but there you have it!

Here is the download link: Sorry Gone!

Enjoy!
Smiles,
Ronnie

Gasp...Another Freebie!

2007-02-13T15:58:00.000-06:00

Woohoo, I had time to create another mini page kit! Go, Ronnie, Go! I did this one because if you are like me, you have pictures taken on superbowl day that have yet to be scrapped. I created this one specifically for this superbowl 41! I was rooting for the Colts and my husband was cheering for the bears...you should've heard our household hooting and hollaring on Sunday! But anywho, here is the preview image for it:

Not everything is on the preview image. There are 3 backgrounds, 1 metal football, 1 football definition overlay, 1 football field number overlay, 2 final score wordarts, 1 king crown sticker and 4 wordarts. I could have added a lot more to it, but with my time restraints and the fact that I can't upload anything over 10 MB to the hosting sites, I had to stop creating. Check this out:

Check out my letterman's alpha here: http://scrapbookbytes.com/store/digital-scrapbooking-supplies/ronnies-sport-series-the-lettermans-alphabet.html.

Also, just to give all my blog readers a heads up...if there is one of my sports page kits that you might want, you might ought to snag it while it is still on the internet because I'm in the process of working out a deal with a paper company and once it is sold to them, I have to take them all down. Just FYI!

As for the freebie, I had to upload it in two parts.

Here is part 1: Sorry Gone!

This is unlimited for one week only, until Tuesday, 2.20.07.

Have a fun one!

Smiles,
Ronnie

Freebie Time!

2007-02-10T10:15:00.000-06:00

I know, I know...I'm certain that there is no one who reads my blog anymore. What can I say...I'm getting busy with life. Let's see if I can summarize what's been happening lately in our lives...we had a superbowl party with my brother-in-law and his family with our new 51" t.v. (and yes I was rooting for the colts albeit my husband was cheering for the bears), everybody has had a bout or two with a nasty virus (except my husband who lives on vitamin C), the baby is about to outgrow his baby carseat at 18lbs and at 6 months, he is sitting up now and scooting to everywhere he wants to go, my older boys absolutely think he's the greatest thing since sliced bread...I'm certain that there's more to elaborate on but right now it's just not occurring to me.

As for my creating, this page kit that I'm about to introduce took me a month to finish. I was inspired by the colors in the picture of the baby on the quickpage...kiwi green and black. I did it at naptimes for the baby in spurts here and there, but woohoo, I finally finished it! Here are the preview images of Ronnie's Eclectic Kiwi and the weblinks:

Ronnie's Eclectic Kiwi Papers

Here is the weblink for the papers: http://scrapbookbytes.com/store/digital-scrapbooking-supplies/RMCCRAY_EclecticKiwiPapers.html

Ronnie's Eclectic Kiwi Elements

Here is the weblink for the elements: http://scrapbookbytes.com/store/digital-scrapbooking-supplies/RMCCRAY_EclecticKiwiElements.html

Ronnie's Eclectic Kiwi Alphabets

Here is the weblink for the alphabets: http://scrapbookbytes.com/store/digital-scrapbooking-supplies/RMCCRAY_EclecticKiwiAlphas.html

Ronnie's Eclectic Kiwi Paint Swooshes

Here is the weblink for Swooshes: http://scrapbookbytes.com/store/digital-scrapbooking-supplies/RMCCRAY_EclecticKiwiPaintSwooshes.html

As for the freebie, it is the quickpage from the page kit. It is resized to 8X8 (if you want the 12X12, you will either have to resize it or buy the elements). Here is the preview of it:

I've also included the painted s stroke, so that you can convert the word art to fit for a girl if that is what you want. See the following illustration:

The freebie will be available unlimited until Tuesday, 2.13.07. Here is the weblink for it: Sorry Gone!

I hate to just stop in for just a little bit but I gotta go before John wakes up. Hope you enjoy the freebie and if you download it, just a little comment would be greatly appreciated.

Also, just a side note if any of you were curious...I've stepped down from designing at scrapbook-elements just for the simple fact that I'm strained for time as it is. I want to keep designing (it's what keeps me sane in a toddler's world), I just have to be real and do what I can right now without overstepping my bounds...if that made any sense to you all. There is only so much time in a day and trying to raise a family...it just was weighing to heavily on my mind to be designing for two websites and not doing diddly squat for either one of them. So, I've decided to be just exclusive with scrapbook-bytes for the time being, until my situation changes (meaning the baby allows me more computer time).

Thanks!

Smiles,
Ronnie

My Big Sale!

2006-11-24T22:11:00.000-06:00

Yes, I'm joining the multitude having a sale. Here is my ad:

Here is the weblink for my sale items: http://scrapbookbytes.com/store/manufacturers.php?manufacturerid=27

It has been a very hectic Thanksgiving holiday. We've had a tragedy in the family and we are in grief right now. I'll give details later, but rest assured that my immediate family is safe and sound. It's just so hard for me to talk about right now...so, I won't.

I will close with a pic of the baby:Hope you had a wonderful holiday!

Smiles,
Ronnie

Can you believe it...a freebie!

2006-11-06T19:19:00.000-06:00

Yes, I do rise from the ashes every once in awhile to post on my long forgotten blog. John absolutely forbids me from posting on the internet nowadays, let alone create anything. As a matter of fact, I'm sitting here typing this with him wailing right beside me. I've gotta go take care of him, I will be right back...

...Mkay, got him occupied in the kitchen in his bouncey seat with the toy bar. He absolutely refuses to sit in his bouncey seat in my computer room, plus he will not sit quietly on my lap while I'm at the computer. But the kicker is, he will sit quietly in my lap when I'm sitting in my rocking chair in front of the television. Go figure! Well, he's crying once again, be back as soon as I can...

...As a matter of fact, he won't nurse while I'm sitting at the computer. He is one obstinate little boy! Here is the latest picture that I have of the little cheeks begging to be kissed little boy...

Well, a quick recap on what has happened to me lately...I had a big fight with mastitis, Matthew had strep throat, James had pneumonia and was hospitalized for four days, but the good stuff is that we went on a week long camping vacation, had a wonderful birthday party for my oldest, got excellent reviews on my two oldest at the parent/teacher conferences for the first quarter, my oldest made his first official goal in a soccer game after playing for 3 years (but I, unfortunately, forgot my camera). That's been my life in a nutshell for the past 2 months.

Well, I finished the following in the wee hours of the morning this morning...it's just taken me all day today to get it uploaded and posted. It's the first in a series called "Journal Filled Shapes and Paths". They include journal filled shapes (both as pngs and psds so that you can change the text if you so wish), journaling on a path and also a template. Here are the preview images of them and the weblinks:

Ronnie's Journal Filled Shapes: Pregnancy Here is the weblink for pregnancy: http://scrapbookbytes.com/store/product.php?productid=20233

Ronnie's Journal Filled Shapes: Baby

Here is the weblink for Baby: http://scrapbookbytes.com/store/product.php?productid=20232

And Ronnie's Journal Filled Shapes: Little Pilot
Here is the weblink for Little Pilot: http://scrapbookbytes.com/store/product.php?productid=20234

And for the freebie is my template from my Little Pilots Journaling Shapes for 24 hours. Here is the preview image for it: Sorry Gone!

And finally, here is the weblink for my freebie template, available for 24 hours only: Sorry Gone!

And now I gotta go, the baby is vying for my attention.

Smiles,
Ronnie

Tornado!

2006-09-25T20:03:00.000-05:00

Well, I don't know if any of you knew or not, but our town got knocked catty wompas by a tornado on Friday! It basically made a swipe through our town and it is now feeling the repurcussions. Our house and vehicle got hail damage (baseball sized hail), but we were some of the lucky ones. My oldest son is a member of the cub scouts and we went around with the cub scouts today handing out water to the volunteer helpers. You know, it really is eerie to drive through town and see plywood covering windows, to see gas pumps sitting at an angle, to see huge road signs twisted and contorted, to see trees uprooted at the tourist information building. Kind of gives you a surreal feeling. But, thank the Lord, not a single person was hurt. But it went through at 2:30 in the afternoon, so all the people working in those businesses had to be cowering in the bathrooms. I scooped up the baby and James and we scurried down to our basement. My two oldest said they had to run the tornado drill at school. My oldest said he was so scared that he was crying. Thank the Lord, the elementary school wasn't touched, but the middle school didn't fare so well. The middle school students were kneeling down in the hallway when parts of the roof were torn off over them. But, once again, thank the Lord, none of them were hurt.

I just wanted to touch base with you all, to let you know that we are all okay. Thanks Gina, for asking! It never really occurred to me that some of you might know that mother nature played a hard hand of poker on us Friday. But we are all okay!

As for the baby (shhhh, he's sleeping right now), he's growing, growing, growing! It's getting a little heavy carrying him in the car seat now! His nickname is Mr. Grumpy Diapers, since the following picture is what he does a lot of: He certainly is not a content baby, like my middle son was. I have had all types of babies...from very colicy to very content. He's not as fussy as my first one was, but he is definitely comparable. But he has started to smile, during his not fussy 5 minutes during the day. But you know what, and I know I'm biased, he is certainly adorable!

Well, I gotta go, before my other 3 boys start tearing the house apart (they are running in the hallway and throwing toys in their bedrooms...so, I've gotta go herd them and calm them down). Talk at ya all later!

Smiles,
Ronnie

Quick Update!

2006-09-16T15:31:00.000-05:00

Since the baby is sleeping right now and the boys are playing, I thought I would update you all.

I found this gem of a picture on my camera. I usually hate pictures of me, but this one I thought turned out rather nice. Here it is:

This was taken by my 5 year old son the day after he was born. Think I got a photographer on my hands?

The baby absolutely hates to go to sleep during the day. He fights sleep big time. Which makes him a tad bit on the fussy side during the day. He's asleep right now just because we made a trip to watch my oldest son play soccer today and a lot of the times when he goes on a vehicle ride, he falls asleep. Not all the time, but it worked this time. But he does great at night since he fights sleep during the day...makes him extremely tired at night. He's not an all night sleeper just yet, but the feedings during the night are getting fewer and farther in between. He rolled over at 5 1/2 weeks old (my other baby rolled over when he was 3 weeks old!).

I've been a terrible blogger and designer lately...absolutely nill on my end. My computer times are extremely limited during the day, since I'm constantly consoling a crying baby and by the time I get everybody down for the night, I'm exhausted and can't hold my eyes open long enough to turn the computer on. So, that's where I stand on my end of the world.

I'm constantly taking pictures, but those are starting to pile up. I've got a journal started with stuff to write on different layouts, once I start making them. I just completed his birth layout a couple of weeks ago. I actually used my blog for the journaling on that one. Here it is:

Credits:
The Naked Flower by Anna Aspnes of designerdigitals
The stitching by Elizabeth McFarlane, a freebie on her blog
The Safety Pinned Jewelry Tags by Katie Pertiet of designerdigitals
God Alpha by Jennifer Hutchison of digitalscrapbookplace
Pacifier on Ribbon and baby worded background by Ronnie McCray of "The Pacified Baby" from scrapbook-elements
Heart made by Ronnie McCray of "Chocolate Covered Cherries" from scrapbook-elements
Clocks are from pictures that my husband took of the hospital clock throughout the whole night. The clock on the final page, I manipulated the hands on to make it say 3:18 because my husband was too concerned at his arrival to take a picture of the clock when he was born.

Well, my oldest is wanting an ice cream sundae...so I need to go.

I'm hoping by the time he is 4 months old he will let me sit at the computer for a little while during the day to accomplish some stuff, but we will see.

Smiles,
Ronnie